Stopping the Growth Saboteur

"If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn't sit for a month." These are insightful words from the 26th President of the United States, Theodore Roosevelt. Can you relate?As much as I'd like to say, "I have no idea what you're talking about, Teddy." I can't.Well, I could, but it would be a bold-faced lie and those closest to me would call me out on it. Let me fess up and agree with that line made famous from the old Pogo cartoon, "We've met the enemy and s/he is us."I won't speak for you. But I will speak for me. For far too long, I was my own worst enemy and, by far, my harshest critic.To make matters worse, I wasn't conscious of all of the ways I undermined or sabotaged my own success. Over a period of time, I began to see some of the subtle ways it occurred. In recent years, I have taken steps to stop sabotaging myself.In those moments when my vision is crystal clear, I realize there are times I still do it. Part of it comes from being a recovering perfectionist, part of it comes from being insecure, and part of it remains hidden away.

Just An Ordinary Guy

I am sharing my story with you -- not because I have overcome and no longer have these struggles. But, rather I seek to embrace transparency and vulnerability about my struggles.Through this process, I have found it necessary to extend grace to myself for my shortcomings. I've also discovered that being vulnerable about my struggles fosters deep connections with others who also know those struggles.Hopefully, you will avoid some of these pitfalls, or at least shorten your learning curve.I love what Admiral Hyman Rickover said,

We must learn from the mistakes of others, we don't live long enough to make them all ourselves.

Like many of you, I came from humble beginnings in a small town. We were a middle-class family — in a good year. I was the first in my family to graduate college.You may ask, “Well, what’s that got to do with anything?” Perhaps nothing.Except that it shaped how I saw myself -- average and ordinary. I wasn't a star athlete. Truth be told, I wasn't even a good athlete. I did wrestle one year in high school and had a perfect record. (Never won a match.)Nor did I see me as exceptionally talented or gifted. No one ever blamed me for breaking the curve.If like me, you see yourself as average and ordinary, you may not consider yourself as someone who deserves success. When opportunities came my way, I was prone to respond, Who? Me? Are you talking to me? You think I could do that?WHO AM I that I am capable or worthy of doing that?

Is Your Mindset Your Worst Frenemy?

Then one day, a few years back, I realized that "Who AM I?" was always the first question that ran through my mind when some great opportunity arose. It was my default mindset. My automatic response. To any and every situation.Here's one example. Back in 2004, Chuck Colson launched the Centurions Program. I saw an email about it and thought it was an interesting opportunity -- except for the rigorous application process through which they would select 100 members for the program.First thoughts to cross my mind -- who am I? Why would they ever select me?As the application deadline drew near, I just happened to be attending a board meeting where one of Chuck's key staff members was also in attendance.Mariam and I were sharing a ride from the hotel to the meeting venue and somehow began talking about the Centurions Program."Oh Kevin, you'd be perfect for the program," she exclaimed. My immediate, internal response, was, "Who me?" I can't remember if I verbalized it, but I certainly remember thinking it.With Mariam's encouragement, I applied and was accepted into the program. Unfortunately, that was not the end of my “Who me?” moments.A few years would pass before I would become consciously aware of my faulty default.It was one of those "gradually and then suddenly" experiences. It doesn't technically qualify as an epiphany. There were no flashing lights, clanging bells, or screaming sirens.Like the crack of dawn as the sun begins its journey across the sky. There's a bit of light. You see shapes and shadows. As the light shines brighter you begin to see things more clearly.That was how I discovered a mindset that was a frenemy. It seemed like a friend but acted like an enemy. Constantly undermining me. Beating me down. Reminding me that I do not belong and don't measure up.

Gradually, Then Suddenly

What led to my discovery of this faulty mindset? Actually, it was the confluence of several things.A serious study of Appreciative Inquiry and learning that the questions we ask determine what we will find. That led me to become a Creating the Future Fellow. Creating the Future is an organization co-founded by Hildy Gottlieb and Dimitri Petropolis who teach that when you change the questions, you change the world.During this same season, I surrounded myself with great friends, mentors, and coaches. One day I received a call from a prospective client. They asked would I consider taking on what, at the time was a dream gig. It was a gig I would love to do. While I had tons of experience, I was aware that they might perceive me as lacking some official credential for the task.What was my immediate response?Well, it was the first time I was consciously aware of having a different default response rather than the standard, "Who am I?"This time, the thought that immediately crossed my mind was, "Why not me? I have tons of experience. I have studied and prepared for years for an opportunity just like this. Hey, they called me. I didn't go looking, or begging for this."Have you ever had one of those moments where time freezes and you seem to become an observer of yourself? It was like that! I remember thinking, "Whoa, something has changed. You are different."You know what else? I remember liking it. A lot.So much so, that I grabbed an index card, scribbled the Why Not Me? on it, and posted it to my desk. It's still there to this day as a reminder.Yes, there are times when "Who am I?" tries to raise it's whack-a-mole head when some really awesome opportunity arises. When it does, I grab my "Why Not Me" mallet and pound it back where it belongs.What about you, my friend? Do you have any default mindsets that keep popping up and holding you in their clutches? What is your "Who am I?" default?How can you begin reprogramming that default to something more like, "Why not me?"Let me encourage you. Please do not let a faulty mindset rob you of your bright future. Decide today that you are done with stinking thinking. Starting today, you are adopting a new mindset and reprogramming your faulty default response.

Do Something Right NOW:

• Share this post with someone you know and strike up a conversation with them. It's easy-peasy, just click a button at the top or bottom of the page.
• Join the Living Your WHY Facebook Group.
• Participate with me for a Facebook Live session about mindsets.
• Schedule a quick connect call with me. I’m offering a limited number of these in June as my schedule permits.
• Sign up to be one of the insiders and get dibs on what's new or next on this journey.

[convertkit form=4868835]In my next post, I'll share some tips I use to help me master my mindset. It's a process you can use.

What's Stopping You?

When was the last time you allowed yourself to dream? I mean dream BIG? Possibly bigger than you ever dreamed before?Were you attending a motivational meeting where you were mesmerized by one of the masters of motivation? It could have been a Tony Robbins, Zig Ziglar, Les Brown, or Oprah meeting.  You sat captivated by their charm and charisma. You heard something that sparked a fire within you. You saw something as possible and for a few moments, you saw the dream as attainable. Maybe, there was something about the environment.Truth be told, it could be that everything in the environment was carefully constructed and orchestrated to inspire and encourage you to dream big. The meeting included elements of religious fervor -- inspirational speakers, testimonies of transformed lives, all in a setting surrounding you with the trappings of success and high levels of energy and adrenaline.If you're a person of faith, maybe your moment occurred at a men’s meeting, a women’s weekend, or perhaps something like a Passion Conference. You remember that moment, where you saw something in your future that you might have never seen before. Or maybe it allowed you to reconnect with a dream you had years ago.At some point, you had an epiphany and saw your future. It called, inspired, and excited you. Heck, it might have overwhelmed or even frightened you.Whenever it was and whenever you were, it was a time when you dreamed BIG.You saw a glimpse of some possibility in your future that captivated your imagination and invited you to set out on an amazing journey. You were ecstatic!You were in an idyllic setting where you, having been surrounded by dreamers and doers -- immersed into the power of positivity and possibility. It was there that you:

• Developed a plan
• Wrote a letter to your future self
• Created a list of goals
• Developed daily affirmations
• Even found a study buddy or accountability partner

You were pumped and primed. Ready and raring to go. You took a step, two steps, or even a few steps in the direction of your dream.But then something happened. It wasn't as easy as you had thought it would be sitting at the seminar, conference, or retreat. Things did not happen as you had hoped. As a matter of fact, things in your life moved in a radically different direction than you had envisioned.Things went south. Very far south and very fast. Some people refer to this,  “the $#*% hit the fan.”Now, you find yourself wondering what went wrong? What do they (all the successful people) have that you don't have?Let's get real, if the questions that eat at you are the ones that used to eat at me, they are much more pointed and personal?

• What’s wrong with me?
• Where did I screw up?
• Is this just not meant to be?
• Why won't this work for me?
• What do they have that I don’t?

You find yourself back in the rut of routine and wondering if life, your life, will ever be any different. On top of that, you may be battling despair, possibly making last ditch efforts to not sink into depression.A wise writer once diagnosed your condition as being heartsick. It occurs when something you hope for  is deferred or denied.When your life goals, ambitions, and dreams are thwarted, it can affect your heart.That last question, “What do they have that you don’t?”Maybe there really is something they have that you don’t. You might think it’s just one little thing, but in reality, that little thing is actually quite significant.Henry Ford nailed it when he said, "Whether you think you can or you can't -- you're right.”It’s not a question of whether or not you are motivated to change. The reality is, change can be difficult and there are times when motivation alone is simply not enough.It’s a matter of mindset.Mindset matters. Most.Mindsets are beliefs. The beliefs you have about yourself, how you see your gifts, talents, and abilities. Mindset includes what you think you are capable of and what you believe lies in the realm of possibility for you.The single biggest difference between many of those who actually do and myriads of others who only dream of doing is their mindset.[clickToTweet tweet="Doers adopt a mindset that adds motion to their motivation." quote="Doers adopt a mindset that adds motion to their motivation."]I love how John Wooden put it, “Things work out best for those who make the best of the way things work out.” That’s a mindset.Stephen Covey phrased it this way, “I am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions.” That’s also a mindset.Your mindset determines how you interpret situations. Hear these words from Chuck Swindoll, “We are all faced with a series of great opportunities brilliantly disguised as impossible situations.”Last, but certainly not least, the motivational master himself taught, “We become what we think about,” Earl Nightingale.Mindset matters. Do not believe that others have it easier than you. Nor should you accept that the way things currently are is the only way they can be.Instead, believe you can change, achieve, and accomplish — even if the odds are against you.[clickToTweet tweet="If you want to change your life, first master your mindset." quote="If you want to change your life, first master your mindset."]Choosing Your MindsetCarol Dweck, one of the leading experts on mindset believes it is the key to success and achievement. She is a Stanford professor and researcher author of Mindset: The New Psychology of Success.Dweck has discovered that people have one of two basic mindsets. Those with a fixed mindset believe what they have is what they have and all they will ever have. They entered life with a certain amount of smarts and talent. At birth, they were either a winner or a loser in life’s lottery. Many with a fixed mindset have a “chip on their shoulder” and are always trying to prove something.Then, there are those with the growth mindset. In spite of where they were born or what smarts and talents they entered life with, they see endless possibilities for growth and development. They are lifelong learners and spend their days trying to improve, rather than prove, themselves.Dweck’s book is certainly worth a read or a listen. If you’re not sure about her book, invest 10 minutes and watch her TED Talk.Maybe the achievers you admire really do have something you don’t have, or, as Carol puts it, at least not yet. They have learned to manage, maybe even master, their mindset.If you have a fixed mindset, you probably begrudge others for their success and  feel obliged to accept the situation as “just the way it is”.But, if you adopt a growth mindset, you will find ways to overcome the obstacles and learn in every situation.Don’t settle. By all means, please don’t sink. Take some positive action right now. Next up, I’ll share one major mindset I shifted and how it made a dramatic difference.What now?

What’s the BIG dream you have? At this moment, what’s holding you back?

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Sign up to be one of the insiders and get dibs on what's new or next on this journey.

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The Power of Finding Your ONE Thing

Have you ever struggled to identify what’s most important now? I certainly have. If someone stopped you right now and asked you, “What’s most important now?” How would you answer?Well, you were just asked that question. Pause for a moment and ponder your answer. Got it? Tuck it away in your memory or jot it down somewhere as we will come back to it in a moment. That question, “What’s most important now?” is posted on my desk as a reminder. I posted it there more than a year ago after reading The ONE Thing by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan. Honestly, even though that reminder has been posted there for over a year, there are times that I’ve struggled to answer that question.Struggled might be understating it just a wee bit. I had used What’s most important now? as shorthand for what Gary and Jay call the focusing question.

What’s the ONE Thing you can do such that by doing it, everything else will be easier or unnecessary?

When I first read The ONE Thing, I found this question perplexing. I pondered it. What is the one thing I should do? That one question launched dozens of others in my mind.

• What do you mean one thing? There are dozens of things on my to-do list and they are all important. How can I pick just one?

• The one thing according to whom? My boss (or client), spouse, kids, parents, etc.?

• One thing? Oh yeah, win the lottery! (You do know that creates more challenges than it solves, right?)

I pondered. Made lists of possible ONE things. Pondered some more. Then I got annoyed and downright frustrated. So I wrote it on a card and posted it on my desk.Do you ever struggle to answer that question?

Confusing Urgent and Important

Ever heard of the tyranny of the urgent. If you don’t know it by name, let me assure you, you know it by experience. While Stephen Covey may be the person most often associated with the phrase, it actually originated in a little book by the same name, Tyranny of the Urgent written in 1984 by Charles E. Hummel.Hummel, and later Covey (and Roger and Rebecca Merrill to be technically accurate) noted that there are always urgent things clamoring for your attention. Here’s how Hummel summarized it,[Tweet "Your greatest danger is letting the urgent things crowd out the important"]It can be extremely difficult to sort out the important from the urgent.Returning to your answer to the opening question, What’s most important now? Was your answer truly addressing what’s most important now, or what’s most urgent in this moment? Your answer to that question may be dramatically different an hour from now and might even be completely different tomorrow.There is a difference between urgent things and important things. A huge difference. But most of us are caught in the tyranny trap.I now realize the tyranny of the urgent actually filtered the way I read, heard, and interpreted the focusing question. You see, I changed the can to a should and it made all the difference in the world.Perhaps, I am the only person in the whole world who ever changed the can to a should and by so doing, redirected the question to focus on what’s urgent rather than what’s important.You see, I was using the question as a filtering question — out of all of the things on my to-do list, what’s most urgent now? But that’s not the question.It was only as I revisited the content from The ONE Thing earlier this year, that I saw it in a different light.I noticed that Gary and Jay labeled it a focusing question. The question actually asks what’s the ONE thing you can do such that by doing it, everything else becomes easier or unnecessary. Hmm.[Tweet "What if the ONE thing that could change everything is not even on your to-do list?"]

My Discovery

It was through an exercise of reverse-engineering the future that allowed me to discover the ONE thing I can do. Gary and Jay call it planning to the now. Identify your most important someday goal. Say it’s 5 - 10 years in the future.Then back it up. If that’s where you want to be in five years, then where will you be in three years? Back it up some more, in one year? In six months, in three months, in one month? And then reversed engineer it all the way back to today and right now. It’s like lining up the dominoes that lead to your future.What’s the first domino in the chain? And what can you do right now that makes the rest of the dominoes fall faster? That’s one way to identify your ONE thing. Here’s how Gary and Jay depict the power of your ONE Thing**.Remember, it’s not what should you do to get things off of your to-do list. But what can you do that makes everything else easier or even unnecessary.It took me quite a while to finally figure out my answer to that question. Forget finding the perfect answer. If you’re a perfectionist or recovering perfectionist you can endlessly over-think and over-analyze this.[Tweet "Aim for progress, not perfection!"]The ONE thing I have committed to doing is writing — every single day. Right now I’m in a 6-week blogging blitz and invite you to come along. You can find out more here.What about you? Have you reverse-engineered your future to help you identify the ONE Thing that will make everything else easier or even unnecessary? If not, why not give it a try? You just might find the clarity you seek.

Calls to Action:

• Who do you know that would benefit from reading this post? Please pass it on!
• Join the new Living Your WHY Facebook Group created just for you and people like you to explore topics like this.
• Please schedule a Quick Connect Call so we can get connected or reconnected. These are limited in number based on my availability.
• Provide your name and email address so you can be invited to the Facebook Live chat exploring how you can take action towards your most important goals.

[convertkit form=4868835]Please keep me posted on your progress by leaving a comment below.** The Living a Domino Run is Figure 25 from the book The ONE Thing: The Surprisingly Simple Truth Behind Extraordinary Results by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan, Bard Press 2013. www.the1thing.com. It is shared with permission.

5 Lessons Learned through 66 Days of Time Blocking

Are you familiar with time blocking? Have you ever considered conducting an experiment to see if you could accomplish more through time blocking?Yesterday, I completed my first ever 66-Day challenge. You can learn more about the 66-Day Challenge here. Let me explain and allow me to share what I have learned and continue to learn as a Founding Member of Time Blocking Mastery.Time blocking is committing a block of time to doing one thing and only one thing during that block of time. It is the opposite of multitasking.I completely suck at multitasking. If you’ll be honest, I bet you do too.When you multitask your brain is constantly switching from one task to another and it takes longer, much longer to get things done. There’s much more to say about multitasking, but I’ll save it for another time and post.I’m not exactly sure when or where I first heard of time blocking. Through the years, I’ve known several people, all of whom I considered high achievers and incredibly productive, who attributed their success to time blocking.However, I vividly remember when I first heard of The ONE Thing by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan. It was a video in which Pat Flynn was touting the book and called it a game-changer.That was enough for me. I ordered the book and devoured it. I remember Gary and Jay advocating time blocking as the fundamental skill behind great achievement.Late last year, as I was developing my goals for 2016, one of my goals for the year was to master time blocking. There’s a lot I want to accomplish and I know time blocking is critical to making meaningful headway towards all of those other goals.Then, earlier this year, I received an email from Jay Papasan announcing the launch of a new program, Time Blocking Mastery. Jay was looking for 100 people to participate in a 10-week pilot of their new course before making it available to the public.I watched the video and I was intrigued. Immediately, I was compelled to apply.A few weeks later, I received notification of my acceptance as a Founding Member of Time Blocking Mastery. Me and 99 of my new friends were joining Jay Papasan and Geoffrey Woods for a 10-week journey to master time blocking.Through those 10 weeks, Jay and Geoff walked us through the key principles and skills necessary to master time blocking. The 100 Founding Members each chose a 66-day challenge as the focus of their time blocking. We had a private Facebook group where we would share our experiences, explore best practices, and encourage one another on the journey.As my first 66-day challenge was drawing to a close, I began reflecting on what I learned.

Top five insights:

1. Time blocking is tactical, finding your ONE Thing is strategic. You probably get that time blocking is a strategic approach to managing your time. But in, and of itself, time blocking is really a tactic. The power comes from focusing your time on what matters most in your life or business. That’s where the ONE Thing comes in.At the heart of The ONE Thing is this focusing question.[Tweet "What is the ONE thing I can do such that by doing it, everything else will be easier or unnecessary?"]Discovering the ONE Thing that matters most is an exercise of reverse engineering your big goals in life and lining them up like a set of dominoes.Identify a big goal in life that you want to accomplish. From that goal, work backwards. To accomplish that someday goal, what do you need to accomplish five years from now? What do you need to accomplish one year from now? Then back it down to six months, three months, and one month from now. What do you need to accomplish this week all the back to the present. What’s the one thing you CAN do that will move you forward to your future?For me, I decided the ONE thing I can do that is most significant to my future goals is to write every day. Every single day! And I decided to set the bar high for myself. To write 90 minutes a day, every day for 66 days.
2. Mastery is not perfection. Don’t confuse the two. This distinction is absolutely essential! Especially for the recovering perfectionists. Somehow, in the past, I had equated mastery with perfection. To master anything, meant doing it perfectly. All the time. That is simply not the case. Nor is it possible.The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines mastery as “knowledge and skill that allows you to do, use, or understand something very well.” Very well is very close to perfect. Actually, it is close enough for what really matters.Please do not confuse mastery with flawlessness. That’s a mistake many perfectionists make and fail to enjoy mastery because they have confused mastery with perfection. Consequently, they often fail to experience the benefits of mastery.You will miss a day.
3. Extend yourself grace, get up, and keep going. When life happens and you break your streak by missing a day or two, or three, don’t beat yourself up. Instead, lift yourself up by being gracious to yourself. Don’t make excuses for your failure and don’t allow your failure to derail you.Instead get back on track and get going again. If you simply stalled out for a day, either make the time up over the next few days or extend your time to make sure you complete the 66 days. If you fell off the wagon, start a new set of 66 days. Remember, you’re in this for the long haul.
4. Time Blocking is easier when done in community. Like so many things in life where change is challenging, those changes are easier to accomplish when doing them in community. Jay recruited 100 people as Founding Members of Time Blocking Mastery.I did not know a single person in the group when it began. That did not matter.We were part of a community — in this case, a private Facebook Group. A community is a group of people united by something in common. Perhaps they live in close proximity to one another. Maybe they share common interests or experience(s). In this case, we were all on a common quest — to master time blocking over a 10-week period and provide feedback on the pilot program.The 100 of us in this community were there sharing the learning journey, sharing our experiences (aspirations, frustrations, failures, and eventually successes). I found it helpful to know there were 99 others pursuing the same quest. For me, posting my daily progress was an important part of my personal accountability and key to my success.Whether your current quest for mastery is time blocking or anything else, find a way to do it in community.
5. Approach time blocking one day at a time. Don’t get overwhelmed by thinking about the 66 days and how you will ever get to the finish line. Commit to the long-term and take it one day at a time. Perhaps you’re familiar with the saying, “It’s hard by the yard, but inch by inch, it’s a cinch.”The idea behind a 66-day challenge is that the latest research shows it takes much longer than 21 days to establish a new habit. If you stick with that new activity for 66 days you have reached the point where that activity is now habitual.Take it one day at a time. Check off your daily progress and link your days together to form a streak. Keep the streak going and soon you’ll find you are on your way to mastery.Use a tracker to measure your progress. Here’s where you can download a printable 66-day calendar to track your progress. There are even free apps you can use to create your goal and track your progress.I am grateful to be a Founding Member of Time Blocking Mastery. It has certainly given me the boost I needed to accomplish my goal of mastering time blocking. I have no plans of stopping.Just two weeks into the program I began a second 66-day challenge and just checked off Day 51 of that challenge. Now I am extending time blocking to other parts of my day and other high priority projects.

What does this mean for you?

Maybe nothing. If that were the case, you would have stopped reading by now.This is post #2 in week one of a six-week blogging blitz. Here's the post that introduced it and invited you to come along.Consider these options:

• Watch the introductory video on Time Blocking Mastery.
• Share or send this post to two (or more) people in your network who you think would benefit. The icons are at the top and bottom of the post to make it easy.
• Schedule your quick connect call with me to talk about anything that’s on your mind. These are 15-minute calls and I am making myself available for 3 calls a day as my schedule permits. I hope you’ll take me up on it.
• Provide your name and email address so you can be invited to the Facebook Live chat exploring how you can take action towards your most important goals.

 Please keep me posted on your progress. You can leave a comment below.** The 66-Day Calendar is from the book The ONE Thing: The Surprisingly Simple Truth Behind Extraordinary Results by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan, Bard Press 2013. www.the1thing.com. It is shared with permission.Top graphic: Win Nondakowit and sourced from 123RF.com. 

Seeking Traveling Companions

Want to come along with me on a six-week journey? You don’t have to make a reservation, pay a deposit, or provide your credit card information. Heck, you don’t even have to physically travel anywhere to join this journey.However, I do hope you make some movement, perhaps, even significant movement from being a part of this journey.There’s no fancy travel brochure or slide show touting what you will see or where you will go. What I am inviting you to is part journey, part experiment, and part discovery.Let me explain and share with you what has motivated me to launch this particular journey right now.What Sparked the IdeaLast week, I spent a few days in the Florida panhandle by the Gulf of Mexico. My wife, Gwen, and her sister, Connie take an annual sisters’ trip. This year, they decided to invite the husbands along. I was grateful for the invitation. If you're like me, you can always find inspiration by the sea. Thanks to Gwen and Connie for allowing me and Tommy to tag along and get inspired.I worked a little each day. And I wrote every day.You see, I am wrapping up my first 66-day Time Blocking Mastery challenge. Today is Day 65, and the finish line is in sight.Much more about that in the next post. For now, let me give shoutouts to Jay Papasan, Geoffrey Woods, and the Founding Members of Time Blocking Mastery for their support over these past 10 weeks and for helping inspire me to continue this journey.For the past 65 days, I have spent time writing every day. Some of what I wrote made its way to blog posts that you can explore here. Some may find its way into books  or future blog posts and hopefully, some of it will remain tucked safely away in the vault. After all, the 66-day program was Time Blocking Mastery, not writing mastery. The goal was to invest time every single day pursuing a high priority goal. My goal just happened to be writing.Enter my next influencer, Jeff Goins. Perhaps more than any other single person, Jeff has inspired me to own my identity as a writer. One of the first books I read by Jeff was You Are A Writer (So Start Acting Like One). I don’t think this requires a spoiler alert, but the key point of the book is writers write. If you feel you must write, then start writing.Are you still with me? The beach provided inspiration. Time Blocking Mastery provided the daily discipline to write. Jeff Goins helped me silence the inner critic and perfectionistic tendencies and to write.Ah yes, but who prompted me to share what I write? For that, I've gotta thank Austin Kleon for Show Your Work. And to give credit where credit is due, let me also thank my friend and mentor, Hildy Gottlieb for introducing me to Austin. In Show Your Work, Austin encourages artists to show your work as you are making it. Don’t wait for the finished product. Invite people into the process of making your art, whatever medium you use.Add Austin’s influence to those already listed and a few days at the beach and I decided that I would conduct a six-week experiment. Starting today, I am sharing three blog posts a week. That’s right, 18 blog posts over the next six weeks.Where are we heading?If I knew, I would tell you. As Ralph Waldo Emerson aptly expressed it, “Life is a journey, not a destination.” These next six weeks are a journey.As of this moment, I’m not exactly sure where it will lead or who I will meet. But it will be fun and I’m sure we will meet some great people along the way. That’s what happens on journeys.Lao Tzu may have been the first to observe that,[Tweet "A journey of 1,000 miles begins with a single step."]This blog post is already step four or five on the journey.It started with the idea. I took action on the idea and developed a six-week schedule and outlined the first couple of weeks. Then I wrote this post. Now I’m sharing it. The journey has begun. Please come along and let’s see where we go and what we learn along the way.What’s the experiment?Well, there are actually several aspects to this experiment. If you already know me, hopefully, you know that authenticity and transparency are important to me. And, I’m a wee bit contrarian. I like to try things that are out-of-the-box.Actually, I’m feeling pretty crazy as I post this. And that’s okay. I committed to this journey and I am going to continue it. Let me share a few parts of this experiment with you and see how you respond.

1. Find my audience. If you’ve ever taken any kind of business or list building course, you probably conducted an exercise to identify your target audience or avatar. I have a good idea of who is in my target audience, but this is a great way to really find out.
2. Get to know my audience. I want to connect with the readers who, for whatever reason, resonate with me and what I write. In recent months, I’ve forged meaningful connections with Hope, Curtis, and Cheryl. All of whom resonated with something I had written and to which they responded. Their responding opened a door to a relationship and the relationship involves ongoing conversation and connection.
3. Grow my audience. There are a lot of list building programs — many of which involve gimmicks and aggressive promotion — not that there’s anything wrong with that. But I wonder, "Can I be more effective building a list by showing up as my authentic self and connecting and serving? It's part of the experiment.
4. Serve my audience. That’s right. I’m an advocate of Servant Leadership and believe that serving others is always the right thing to do. Sharing my best content is one way to do that. Inviting people to join me for a weekly online forum — Blab or Facebook Live to explore the topics I’m writing about on a deeper level. And even scheduling one-on-one connection calls.
5. Expand my network. You see, I want to grow my network of influencers. The best way I know to do that is to ask people I know to introduce me to people they know that they think I should know and who might like getting to know me.

[Tweet "You don't know everybody you need to know, but everybody you know knows someone you need to know."]And the best way to expand your network is simply to ask the people you know, “Who do you know that I should know?” and invite them to make an introduction.What’s in it for You?First off, you will have my gratitude for joining me on this journey. Hopefully, like Hope, Curtis, or Cheryl something from my journey parallels yours and inspires you or helps you connect dots you have yet to connect. Plus, you will get to meet some awesome people along the way and enjoy networking and interaction.There you have it. Are you in? Do you want to come along for the ride? I certainly hope so and I look forward to connecting with you.Here are three ways to join in:

1. Subscribe to the email list to get details on the first online forum and updates on posts as they are published.
2. Like, Tweet, or share this blog post to someone you think would enjoy it. The icons are at the top and bottom of the post to make it easy.
3. You can schedule a quick connect call with me. These are 15-minute calls and I am making myself available for 3 calls a day as my schedule permits. I hope you'll take me up on it.

Join the journey:Looking forward to it!

Is the Big, Bold Claim of Servant Leadership too Audacious?

"If someone said you were “overly American” would you take that as a compliment or a criticism?And if your answer is, “It depends.” Then you may either be a consultant or have the makings of a great consultant.Here’s what happened.I was in Europe and delivered several presentations on Servant Leadership for various business audiences. After my first session, I was informed that one of my comments seemed,…well, “overly American”.The commenter was too kind to say this to my face. Their comment was relayed through my liaison.What exactly does “overly American” mean? For a moment I was nervous. Actually, I was extremely nervous.You see, my visit to Europe occurred days after “Super Tuesday” and suddenly people were thinking Donald Trump’s campaign might be more than a publicity stunt.Did being “overly American” mean coming across like a Presidential candidate on the debate stage? Gosh, I hope not! After all, I was there advocating Servant Leadership. That would not be good.Yes, those highlight reels (more like lowlights) from the debates were televised around the world. And the shenanigans that were passed off as debates were topics of several conversations.My “overly American” comment was actually a quotation from one of my favorite servant-leaders, Ari Weinzweig, CEO and co-founder of Zingerman’s.[Tweet "If you really live it, Servant Leadership changes everything."]Do you see the “overly American” part of that quotation? Maybe not, especially if, like me, you’re an American.It was the “changes everything” part. Actually, it’s just the “everything”.“You don’t really mean that do you? Servant Leadership changes everything? Come on, you can’t be serious?"To be “overly American”, at least in this context, meant “to supersize everything”. (Do you mean everything?…sorry, I couldn’t resist).Perhaps they thought I had used hyperbole. The literary device used to make a point and not to be taken literally.You know the sort, “We waited forever to get a table at the restaurant.” Really? If that were true, wouldn’t you still be at the restaurant waiting?“I’m hungry enough to eat a cow.” Well, maybe not a whole cow, but a 12 ounce Flo’s Filet would be great about now.You don’t really mean Servant Leadership changes everything, do you?Actually, I do. And so does Ari.I have asked him about it before. The full statement, in context, is found on page 115 of his book, Being A Better Leader.

The phrase “Servant Leadership” may sound like one of those nice throwaways they always write in the opening section of employee manuals. But please don’t let any perception of passivity fool you — Servant Leadership is very strong stuff. If you really live it, Servant Leadership changes everything.

Yes. Servant Leadership has the power to change everything about an individual, organization, or community. The problem most people have isn’t with the claim about the transformative power of Servant Leadership. It’s in the “really living it” part.I can’t scientifically prove that Servant Leadership changes everything, but I do believe this claim is certainly more than hype or hyperbole. I believe it’s the HOPE. Perhaps, it is because of my perpetual optimism that I see the effects of Servant Leadership as being far-reaching.After all, Servant Leadership is a people-centered approach to life and leadership, that puts other people at the center. It places the needs, growth, and development of those led, ahead of those leading.It encompasses all areas and arenas of life. Servant Leadership is not confined to your conduct at the office or limited to the hours of 9 to 5. It’s 24/7 365 (366 this year).This is neither hype nor hyperbole. Servant Leadership is holistic. And, if as Ari suggests, you really live it, Servant Leadership overflows into all areas of life, it impacts all areas of life and leadership.While the following is not an exhaustive list, I thought one way to address the “everything” claim was to produce an A-Z list of things changed by Servant Leadership. Here’s my list:Attitudes, Behavior, Culture, Drive, Engagement, Followership, Goals, Hierarchy, Involvement, Joy, Kindness, Love, Mindfulness, Narcissism, Openness, Power, Quality, Relationships, Service, Trust, Unity, Value, Wellness, Xenophobia, Yearning, and Zeitgeist.With the possible exception of X and Z, I could have easily listed multiple entries for each letter. Maybe this does or doesn't resolve the claim that Servant Leadership changes everything. It's close enough for me, but hey, I'm an American.What have you seen changed by Servant Leadership in your life, company, or community?

The Best Antidote for the Impostor Syndrome

Have you ever had a moment of doubt and uncertainty when you hit send on an email or publish for a post? I am not talking about the time(s) that you wrote a private rant email just to “get if off of your chest” and instead of hitting delete, you accidentally hit send. "Oops! Did I really send that?"Not that I have ever done that, I’ve just heard others talk about doing it and how they wish they hadn’t.The doubt and uncertainty I’m referencing is what I experienced when I shared what was perhaps my most vulnerable post yet. The post where I talked about Ending My Agonizing Epic Struggles with the Impostor Syndrome. If you haven’t read it, you can read it here. Before publishing that post, I shared the post with my wife, Gwen, and asked how she felt about my sharing it.“Is it too much? Is it too personal?”, I asked. We discussed it. She recognized the risks, but encouraged me to “go for it.”I’ve learned to embrace vulnerability from my mentor, Brené Brown. Don’t you love the sound of that, my mentor? Sounds like we know one another, right? Like we actually talk on a regular basis and she checks in on me?Not really. It’s more of a virtual mentorship. You do have some of those, don’t you?I’ve watched her TED Talks numerous times, read her books, even had her read her books to me (you can too with Audible.) Someday, I hope to sit down for a face-to-face chat.Brené helped me discover that vulnerability is not a sign of weakness. Instead, it’s an act of courage and demonstrates strength. Yet, even with all of that, when I hit publish and saw the confirmation message. “Are you sure you want to publish this post?”I paused.Am I really sure I want to publish this post? There was still time to abort.I took a deep breath and hit, “Yes.”And then moved on to my next task to get my mind off of what might happen next with that post.Well, that’s the story I’d like you to believe.Actually, I did move on to other tasks, but my mind kept wondering, has anyone read it yet? Hmm, no comments, that’s not a good sign.Oh come on, please tell me you’ve done that. At least once.Here’s what really happened. Over the next few hours, more people read that post than any other post I’ve written so far. Interesting, eh?It struck a chord with you. And I’m so glad it did.According to the research, I know I am not the only one to struggle with the impostor syndrome. But, at that moment when I am feeling like an impostor, I am tempted to believe that no one else has ever felt this way.For some strange reason, I believe it’s just me. Or you think, you’re the only one who feels like a fraud when it’s happening to you.

The Encounter That Prompted Me to Share

Last month, I exchanged messages with a friend on LinkedIn over a post I had written on Servant Leadership. A few days passed and then I received a message. [Please note: I have permission to share this, but am deleting a few details to protect the privacy of this friend.]“Can I ask you something? I lead by example and always considered myself a strong manager. Lately, I have been leaving work sick. My associates see me struggling -- physically and emotionally. My conflict is, does it make me an empathetic leader that I share and let them see we all have our weaknesses or does it make me look weak?”I pondered how to respond. As I did, I realized this person might be dealing with the Impostor Syndrome.Perhaps the thoughts in their mind were something like this: Here’s the image I project (or want to project), but what if they see me as something other than that? Something less than that?

Will they think less of me as their leader?

Will they think I’m a fraud?

The health condition confronting this individual is serious and presents a multitude of challenges. Wondering how they are, or will be, perceived at work should not even be on the list.But is was! And weighing heavily on their mind.How could I respond and communicate hope and lighten the load?Carefully, thoughtfully, and, of course, Socratic-ally.As part of my reply, I asked, “How do you define a strong manager? As you think about your decision, what are the criteria you are using to determine the rightness of that decision?”What I helped them do was reframe the question. Instead of asking, “Am I a strong manager?” I asked them to consider “What makes a strong manager strong?”Persevering through a personal challenge or health crisis when it would be easier to simply throw in the towel and wallow in self-pity certainly exemplifies strength.[Tweet "Strength is not the absence of struggle, it's persevering through the struggle."]This leader reconciled their challenge by reframing the issue and discovered that the path they chose was authentic for them. As a result of publicly sharing their health challenge, they discovered others in the organization experiencing the same, or similar challenges. As a result, they were able to encourage one another.Rather than losing credibility, this leader gained it. Rather than feeling forced to conceal their struggles, they shared them. The real fraud would have been to masquerade as though everything was fine, and try to conceal the pain to support a caricature of strength.Authenticity is the Antidote The antidote to feeling like an impostor is living and leading authentically. It’s what some people call, being comfortable in your own skin.Being comfortable in your own skin includes accepting yourself, just as you are. Accepting your physical characteristics. Owning your strengths as well as your shortcomings.Authenticity isn’t license for being a jerk nor does it negate becoming the best version of yourself you can be. Actually, authenticity encourages knowing yourself so that your actions originate from within, rather than something you are putting on as an external show.Authenticity frees you from mimicking others and pretending to be someone, or something, you are not. It means being real, rather than being a phony.It’s impossible to be an impostor when you are being your authentic self.Of course, we all have influences. We have mentors, role models, and heroes. Those people who have influenced you and whom you admire. It’s okay to be influenced by others, but you must be yourself.When you see something you admire in others, consider how you can internalize it and find your authentic version of that behavior rather than simply imitating their version.[Tweet "Modify, don’t mimic. Don’t ripoff and duplicate. Instead, adopt and adapt."]Finding Your Authentic SelfSo what is authenticity and how does a leader become [more] authentic?The outward actions are what we see, encounter, and experience. It’s those actions that we judge to be real or fake. However, what determines the authenticity of those actions is usually unseen.[Tweet "Authenticity starts as an inside job."]Think of it as the authenticity iceberg. It is the unseen dimensions below the surface that really determine whether your actions are authentic or not. People judge by what they see, hear, or otherwise experience. But what really determines whether or not they think you are authentic is the harmonious connection between what lies within and shows without.It begins with intentions. What is your aim or purpose? What do you seek to accomplish?Are your intentions to connect, help, or serve others or do you want to impress them, sell them, or in some way use or manipulate them? It’s two different starting points, but your intention sets the course.Add to intentions your personal values — yours are unique and uniquely yours. Having clarity about your values is essential. They serve as the guardrails that determine whether a course of action is, or is not, authentic for you.The current US political season provides vivid examples of some candidates taking delight in berating or belittling others. That behavior may be authentic for them.It doesn’t work for me and it doesn’t win me over as a voter. Anytime I berated or belittled others, I knew I crossed a personal line. I violated a value and also violated another person. YUCK!Authenticity occurs when there is harmony and resonance between our intentions, values, and actions. Authenticity happens naturally when you are living out of your true and best self.People crave authentic encounters. Imagine communities where actions were judged less by their utility (did it produce a desired outcome) and more by their authenticity (was that in line with my intentions and values)?Being comfortable in your own skin not only feels good. It’s also the best way I know to live free of the Impostor Syndrome. Remember, you are only your best when your are being authentically you.Or as Dr. Suess put it,

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.”

Ending My Agonizing Epic Struggles with the Impostor Syndrome

Have you ever felt as though you didn’t belong? That you don’t really deserve the position you hold? That your success is more attributable to luck and timing rather than skill and competence?You just happened to be in the right place at the right time. Anyone could have done what you did. There’s nothing special about you….or is there?If you can relate to any of this, does it help to know that, that you are not alone?Millions of others share these feelings and experiences on a daily basis. According to some studies, as many as 70% have felt like a fraud at one time or another.Unless you’re a con artist, my guess is, you don’t like feeling like a fraud any more than I do.The psychologists labeled this the impostor syndrome. Perhaps you’re familiar with it.It’s a term coined in the 1970s to describe people unable to internalize their accomplishments.The Caltech Counseling Center provides defines it as. “A collection of feelings of inadequacy that persist even in face of information that indicates that the opposite is true. It is experienced internally as chronic self-doubt, and feelings of intellectual fraudulence.”Much has been written about the impostor syndrome. While few people are immune to it, I’m one who is fed up with it. What follows is my contribution based on personal experiences.

A Two-Headed Monster

There are two sides to the impostor syndrome. On one side are the outsiders. These are those people, who for a variety of reasons, question whether or not you belong in the position you are in or whether or not you legitimately deserve the success you have.There are myriads of motivations that move those outsiders. Among them are jealousy, envy, and insecurity.

• Maybe they wish they had the success you’ve had.
• Perhaps, they feel entitled to the position that was granted you instead of them.
• Worse yet, maybe they live in a perpetual state of comparison and something about you and your success, causes them to question themselves and their apparent lack of success.

And then, in a class all by themselves, are the haters.These are the people who found some reason to not like you and apart from a change of heart, they never will. Don’t give them the time of day.Here’s the harsh reality, there is very little you can do to silence or sway the voices of the outside critics. Besides that, there is a minimal return on investment for the time and energy you spend there.[Tweet "The outside critics' voice rings loudest, when it amplifies or echoes the voice of our inner critic."]That’s right.What really fuels the impostor syndrome are the voices we hear inside ourselves. Sometimes that voice seems innocuous and masquerades as a ‘friend’ who simply asks the question, “But what if they’re right? What if you don’t belong? What if they find out you’re a pretender and a fraud?”Then, they are the dark and ominous times that voice yells like a prosecuting attorney, “You’re a fraud, you don’t belong and you damn well know it! You are going to be exposed, evicted, and publicly humiliated.”Our response? Fear. Doubt. Insecurity. Followed by more fear. Doubling doubts. Crippling insecurities.OUCH! Those words sting. They hurt.But where do they come from? Is there any truth to them?

Tracing the Roots

Here’s what I’ve discovered.At some point along the way, there was an encounter, maybe multiple encounters that, at least from our vantage point, attacked some aspect of our identity or caused us to question it seriously.Maybe it’s the voice of some authority figure that echoes in your ears or maybe it’s a high-definition video that vividly captures every detail of that encounter.Whichever it is, it seems to be continuously on demand or playing on perpetual loop in your mind. And it always stands ready to validate the accusation that:YES, YOU are an impostor.NO, you don’t belong.And of course, you didn’t earn it and you certainly don’t deserve it.May I invite you in and we share some sacred space?May I candidly disclose my battle with the impostor syndrome in hopes that it helps both you and me find freedom and release from its vicious grip?Right now, I’m hearing voices.

   This is risky. This is crazy. It might even be insane.

Being this vulnerable will only give the outsiders more ammunition to question your credibility.Trust me, they have more than enough ammunition already. This isn’t going to give them more. It’s going to disarm what they already have.Oh, and the same is true for you and your critics.It’s those inside voices I want to silence. And maybe those are the voices you need to silence too.There were three episodes that together provided ample evidence of me being an impostor. I’ll share them in chronological order.As I entered the eighth grade, I was placed in the ‘gifted program’ at school. (Please don’t judge me and think I am bragging. You will soon see, this was anything but a gift to me.)The public school in my little town chose to conduct an experiment that year. For those of us in the gifted track, we were smart enough to skip Pre-Algebra and go straight to Algebra.Or so they thought.Maybe some of ‘us’ were. I happened to be one of those that wasn’t. The faculty and administration were kind to us and chose to label our epic fail as Pre-Algebra, give us a passing grade, and let us repeat Algebra in hopes of us better understanding it the second time through.Subconsciously, this encounter seriously called into question, whether or not I was really gifted.Hmm, did they (whoever they were) make a mistake in labeling me gifted? The seeds of doubt were sown.At the time, this all seemed relatively harmless. No big deal. They let me and the others continue in the gifted program, so it must have been an honest mistake.A few years passed. I had pretty much forgotten the Algebra episode and most of what I supposedly learned about Algebra along with it.Then came biology.

Owning It

We were studying photosynthesis and cellular respiration. Then there was a test. It wasn’t just any test. Since that day, I’ve regarded is at the test. More accurately, the test of all tests, that I bombed.It was an epic failure. Not for everyone in the class, but there were a few of us that failed miserably.Or at least enough of us failed that it merited the rant of all rants from the teacher. Before the whole class.I still remember the little man pacing through the whole classroom. He was so mad that he was literally spitting.In his hand, the stack of tests. He kept feverishly slapping the tests against his other hand. He couldn’t believe some of us could so completely confuse photosynthesis with respiration.At the height of his tirade he shouted,

If you’re gifted, then I thank God, I’m a jackass.

A few moments later, he passed out the papers.Yep, you guessed it.Mine was on the top of the stack. The one he kept pointing to. The one that seemed to be the target of his tirade. It was the lowest grade in the class and obviously, belonged to the student least deserving of the label 'gifted'.That stung! Bad.For me, this is one of those events captured in high-definition in my mind. Every detail. The veins about to explode on the side of his head. The spit spraying across the room. The anger. The rage. It’s all there.I was a fraud. I didn’t belong.Or at least, that’s the narrative that has always been available and played on demand. It plays every time someone pushes my impostor syndrome button.Anytime, in any arena, where someone asks a question that poses a threat to my credibility. It’s easily, and usually, instantly translated to some version of, “Does he really belong here?” “How did he get through our screening process?”And naturally, the first voice I hear is, “If you’re gifted, I thank God I’m a jackass.”Not anymore! 

Calling it Quits

By going public with my battle, I’m declaring it over. I am depriving it of its ability to paralyze or hinder me any longer.The one thing I have realized that is absolutely essential to me living free of the impostor syndrome is my accepting who I am and being my authentic self. I cannot be an impostor when I am authentically being me.[Tweet "It's impossible to be an impostor when you are being your authentic self."]We can only be impostors when we seek to masquerade as someone other than who we are.Now, you may, or may not like my authentic self and my actions. That’s your prerogative.You may think me a jerk, a phony, or something else. That’s okay. That’s your opinion.Remember, we can neither silence nor control the opinions and voices of the external critics. But we have complete authority to tell the internal critic to sit down and shut up.I am gifted. So are you.[Tweet "Gifted is not a label bestowed on us. It is how we arrived the moment we were born."]It may take some time to uncover your gift and discover your superpower. Trust me, you’re gifted. Don’t ever allow someone to make you doubt that you are.Oh yeah, about that third encounter I mentioned. That happened in college with the English professor affectionately known as Bloody Mary for her generosity with caustic comments in red ink.I don’t relive this encounter every single time I sit down to write something. But it has provided ample evidence that has kept the impostor syndrome alive and well when I have aspired to think of myself as a writer.The episode involved a term paper. It happened a few years before the advent of the word processor. Back in the day of the manual typewriter.I had spent hours on that paper. I’m not sure how many sheets lay waded on the floor before the final version was complete. However, this I do remember — vividly. On the day, the papers were returned to us, mine had a big fat red F on it.About halfway down the first page she drew a line through the paper and wrote,

Run-on sentence, I stopped reading here.

For years, I would see that red line and remember those words almost every time I sat down to write.“Who are you kidding? They won’t even make it through the first page.” Another battle with the impostor syndrome.I want to thank Jeff Goins for encouraging me to say “I am a writer” and own my identity as a writer.Now, I skip submitting any of my writings to Bloody Mary for review. She is no longer in my audience. Her opinion no longer carries any weight.

Your Turn Now

What are you to make of this?Besides being a therapeutic exercise for me, I hope this helps you and others like us.I hope it helps you isolate the voices and the videos that run on autoplay in your mind that cause you to question whether or not your belong. Once you isolate them, I hope you can deconstruct and disempower them.I also hope it encourages you to find your authentic self and live authentically.That’s where we’ll resume in the next post. If you've read this far, you have been most generous with your time and I hope the ROI is worth it for you.If this has connected with you in any way, would you take a moment and leave a comment. I’d love to know your strategies for overcoming the impostor syndrome.

Seven Servant-Leader Secrets for Creating Great Places to Work

Can Servant Leadership help your company become a great place to work? Yes!What if your company is already a great place to work, can Servant Leadership help it become even better? Again, my answer is a resolute yes!What if your company is already a great place to work, can Servant Leadership help it become even better? Again, my answer is a resolute yes!Servant Leadership is how many of the best leaders lead when they are leading at their best. This is true, whether they are knowingly practicing Servant Leadership or not.Wait! Are you suggesting people can be servant-leaders and not know it?Actually, I am. I realize that may sound ridiculous to you. Please let me explain.Want to get the most out of this post? Click here and download your 7 Servant Leadership Secrets worksheet.  

Servant Leadership Fits Us Like A Glove

For the past several years, it's been a personal privilege to formally introduce many leaders and organizations to Servant Leadership. Often, in the early stages of an encounter, I’ll ask about the level of familiarity with Servant Leadership. It’s not uncommon for more than half of the audience to acknowledge they have “never heard of Servant Leadership.” Usually, a few have “some level of familiarity” with Servant Leadership and it’s a rare privilege to work with audiences that have a “high level of familiarity”.Yet, it is equally common, for people to begin smiling and energetically nodding their heads yes as they discover the key concepts of Servant Leadership. What they soon discover is,  “these concepts fit us like a glove.” That was the exact phrase one participant used during my first formal presentation on Servant Leadership. I still love that response.Did Servant Leadership exist before Robert K. Greenleaf coined the term in his 1970 essay, The Servant as Leader? Of course, it did.It’s like gravity.Gravity existed long before Isaac Newton discovered it in the late 1600s. Yet, consider all of the advancements made in discovering gravity and learning its dynamics and how to harness it for flight and space exploration.In the same way, once leaders become aware of Servant Leadership and how it “operates”, they experience greater benefits as they begin consciously and consistently practicing Servant Leadership rather than only doing it accidentally or sporadically.

A Link Between Servant Leadership and Great Workplaces

There’s another reason for my bold claim. It comes from 18 years of the Fortune 100 Best Companies to Work For. Most likely, you have some familiarity with this list. You may even work for one of the great companies on the list.It is fascinating that some of the companies that top the list today did not exist when Fortune began publishing the list. For example, Google, the company that occupies the spot at the top of the list was formed in September 1998 and Fortune published its first list of 100 Best Companies to Work For in January of that same year.I find it equally fascinating that there is an elite group of just 13 companies, affectionately known as the Fortune All Stars, that have made it to the list every year since its inception. What’s even more significant is that more than half of those all-star companies embrace Servant Leadership as their leadership philosophy.That’s strong evidence of a connection between Servant Leadership and being a great place to work.A few days ago, I had the privilege of leading a session on Servant Leadership for the managers of one of Norway’s Great Places to Work, Sopra Steria.  We gathered just one day before the announcement that Sopra Steria was named a Great Place to Work® for the ninth time in the last ten years.As Jim Collins reminded us in Good To Great, greatness is neither a function of luck or circumstance. "Greatness, it turns out, is largely a matter of conscious choice." It's a continual quest and Sopra Steria assembled their leaders to equip and encourage their continued development as leaders.Just so you know, the Great Place to Work® Institute is the also the organization responsible for assessing the companies on the Fortune Best Companies to Work For list as well.As with so many other great companies, the Sopra Steria leaders embody and express Servant Leadership, although this session was their first formal introduction to the concepts.From my interactions with many of their leaders, I observed that Servant Leadership was an apt description of how the Sopra Steria best leaders lead when they are leading at their best. Or how most, if not all, of Sopra Steria leaders, aspire to lead.

Servant Leadership is a people-centered approach to life and leadership that puts other people at the center. It places the needs, growth, and development of those led, ahead of those leading.

We explored seven simple secrets of Servant Leadership that result in a great workplace. Then, the Sopra Steria leaders discussed how these “fit” their view of leadership and how a more conscious and consistent practice of servant-leader secrets would impact their organization as a great place to work.

The Seven Simple Servant-LeaderSecrets:

1. Servant-Leaders — more WE, less ME. It’s not that servant-leaders think less of themselves, they just think of themselves less than they do others. You may recognize that as a paraphrase of how C.S. Lewis defined humility.
2. Servant-Leaders invest in the development of people. They discover the gifts, talents, and aspirations of the people on their team and look for opportunities to help them grow.
3. Servant-Leaders give credit and accept responsibility. They don’t steal credit from others who actually had the ideas or did the work. And servant-leaders certainly don’t throw a team member under the bus to make themselves look better when something goes wrong.
4. Servant-Leaders share information & power. They trust their teams with access to information and empower them with the resources necessary to make wise decisions.
5. Servant-Leaders listen first, talk last (especially when brainstorming). If you want to hear the bright ideas of the people on your team, ask for them. Then listen to what they have to say. Don’t hijack the agenda and stifle discussion by sharing your ideas first.
6. Servant-Leaders prioritize the practice of presence. There is power in giving someone your full attention. When you are with your team members, be fully with them. Turn your digital device off or over so that you can be fully present in the moment rather than distracted by multi-tasking.
7. Servant-Leaders savor the significance of small acts. It’s amazing that people remember the little things you do for them. Sopra Steria sends flowers to new employees before their first day on the job. It’s a tradition for which they are known and loved and a favorite topic of social media.

Granted, none of these secrets alone is necessarily revolutionary. Yet imagine the power when all of the leaders in an organization are on the same page, using a common vocabulary, and framework that aligns with the organization’s core values and advances its aspirations.[Tweet "Servant Leadership is powerful, practical, and personal."]Great leaders are usually already embracing one, or more of these concepts. The invitation I extend leaders is to consider their current leadership challenge and team environment and identify one Servant Leadership secret that would have the greatest impact on their leadership right now.Imagine you were in a session like this. What’s the one change you would identify, that if you began doing immediately, would have the greatest impact on  the effectiveness of your leadership?[Tweet "Remember the power of Servant Leadership is in the doing, not just the knowing."]Congratulations to Sopra Steria on their accomplishment of continuing to be a great place to work. It's a reward that is well deserved and of which I saw abundant evidence through my encounters with their leaders.If your organization is, or aspires to be a great place for great people to do great work, then you may already know, or soon discover that Servant Leadership fits you like a glove.[convertkit form=4890397]

The Primary Colors of Servant Leadership

Ever try summarizing Servant Leadership in just three words? It's not easy. At least it did not come easily for me.If you were to summarize Servant Leadership in three words, what words would you choose? Think about that for just a moment. If you’re struggling, perhaps it's unfair to ask for an answer on the spot.If you are a student of Servant Leadership, then you are probably familiar with the Ten Characteristics of Servant Leadership or perhaps The Seven Pillars of Servant Leadership by James Sipe and Donald Frick.Why would anyone attempt to reduce Servant Leadership down to just three characteristics?That’s a great question. It’s a task I recently assigned myself. Let me explain.As I write this blog post, I’m somewhere over the Atlantic — at this exact moment, about 3,000 miles from my home near Atlanta, Georgia. I’m returning from a week in Oslo, Norway where I facilitated several sessions on Servant Leadership. A beautiful city, great audiences, and a country with a culture quite compatible with Servant Leadership.

The Background of the Challenge

One of those sessions was keynoting the annual conference for Project Management Institute (PMI) Norway. The conference was held at the Nasjonalmuseet (National Museum) — where the work of Edvard Munch is a centerpiece. Edvard Munch is arguably Norway’s most famous artist and the gallery is home to his most famous work, The Scream.Back in October, Merete Munch Lange, President of PMI Norway extended me  an invitation to keynote the conference and address the topic of Servant Leadership. I was honored.A couple of days later, I recall taking an early morning walk and thought it would be clever to create a customized keynote that tied into the conference theme. PMI Norway had selected The Art of Management as their theme since we were meeting at the National Gallery. I selected, The Art of Servant Leadership.Then in November, I had the privilege of spending the better part of a day in Nashville with one of my mentors, Erie Chapman. Naturally, we discussed Servant Leadership as that’s a passion for Erie and it’s how we originally met. You see, Erie is the author of several books. My personal favorite is Radical Loving Care. He’s recently release a bit of a sequel, The Seven Power of Radical Loving Leaders.I thought I was meeting Erie at his office and that we would spend the day talking Servant Leadership amongst other topics. Well, his office turned out to be his studio. As for Erie, he's a real renaissance man. In addition to being an author, CEO, and consultant, he is also a photographer, a screenwriter, and a filmmaker.Our discussions of Servant Leadership were augmented with rich discussions about art.

The Evolution of an Idea

I’m a big fan of Evernote and use it for everything — especially my “noodling”. Noodling is my favorite word for describing that combination of reflection, pondering, and just letting an idea “marinate”.I reviewed Evernote just now and discovered an entry on November 24 where I expanded my speech title to The Art and Artistry of Servant Leadership. I know this was influenced by my time with Erie as we discussed artistry as the skills of the art and how an artist masters their medium as well as the tools of the trade.

The Art and Artistry of Servant Leadership

Several weeks ago, I began pulling everything together to finalize my keynote for the PMI Norway event. It was then that the idea of finding a way to summarize Servant Leadership in three words — well, actually colors occurred.If you’re familiar with the world of color, you know there are three primary colors. If you want to get technical, there are two sets of three and one set of four depending on which artistic medium you work in.In the world of digital media, the primary colors are known as additive and consist of red, green, and blue, better known as RGB. If you work mostly in the print world, you use a subtractive process and the four primary colors as CMYK.A little more research helped me discover that there’s also the RYB spectrum that paint artists use. And since we were meeting at the Norway National Gallery, I opted to use red, yellow, and blue.Oh, and as a bonus, that’s how I met an amazing photographer (Libby Beaty) who, while born in the USA, now lives in Norway. I found a collection of Libby’s photos in the Your Shot gallery on NationalGeographic.com. She’s the photographer of that amazing image below. Here’s the link to her blog site where she has other amazing work displayed. [I told her she could say her work was shown at the National Gallery in Norway as I included three photos in my presentation.]Now, if you recall my the opening question to this post,  you know why, I assigned myself the task of summarizing Servant Leadership in three colors.And in case you goofed off in art class like I did, here’s the important refresher.  Every other color in the spectrum comes from some blend of the three primary colors of the artist’s palette.I actually believe that’s a beautiful metaphor about life and leadership.You may know that Robert K. Greenleaf coined the term ‘Servant Leadership’ in his seminal 1970 essay, The Servant as Leader. However, you may not realize that he never actually provided a succinct definition in any of his writings.

The Primary Colors of Servant Leadership

Before I embark on the three colors, let me share the definition of Servant Leadership I’ve landed on after years of study and attempts to practice Servant Leadership.

Servant Leadership is a people-centered approach to life and leadership, that puts other people at the center.

[Tweet "Servant Leadership places the needs, growth, and development of those led, ahead of those leading."]So, after a lot of thought and introspection, here are the three attributes I chose as the primary colors of Servant Leadership. Remember, I worked with the RYB palette.

Empathy: the Heart of Servant Leadership

It begins with red. One of the first thoughts I have when I think of red is the heart. When I think of the heart relative to Servant Leadership, I think of empathy. Empathy springs from our hearts.Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. Understanding that servant leadership is a people-centered approach to life and leadership that places people at the center. Then, empathy is essential to understanding their needs and desires. Empathy is our ability to understand, share, and respect the feelings of others.

Caution! Remember to Listen

Then there’s yellow. Universally, yellow is associated with caution or warning. I believe there’s one key attribute of Servant Leadership that most, if not all, of us can use frequent reminders about. Did you guess listening?I figured you did. Listening isn’t an automatic response for many of us. Most leaders receive formal training in reading, writing, and public speaking. When I asked the 100+ people attending the PMI Norway event, it was close to unanimous those whom received training in those three.When I asked how many had received any kind of formal training in listening — well, what would you think. It was three, well four if you include me.I love what Larry King said, I remind myself every morning:

Nothing I say this day will teach me anything. So if I’m going to learn, I must do it by listening.

Listening is essential. The great servant leaders I know have helped me learn to listen first, talk later. 

Authenticity: Being the Real Deal

Now, what about the blue?Hmm. I had to noodle that a while. I  finally landed on authenticity. You know, “true blue”. I believe the question, “Are you for real?” is on the minds of many followers. Especially, those whose leaders proclaim Servant Leadership.Recalling the definition of Servant Leadership provided earlier, you may see why so many followers want to know if their leaders who aspire to be servant-leaders are for real. “You’re putting my needs, growth, and development ahead of your own? For real?”

How About That for a Job Title?

During the conference, before I spoke, Kate Henrikson, a participant sought me out at a break. She is the COO, of Miles AS, a consulting firm in Norway. She handed me her card, it reads, “COO/ Daglig tjener". Isn’t that cool?In case your Norwegian is no better than mine, that translates to daily servant. And I just discovered their CEO is referred to as group servant.Now here’s what I love. And I’ve found this to be true in so many of my consulting encounters. This company was practicing Servant Leadership without the label or framework. It was outside consultants who were interested in their unique approach to company culture who helped them discover that Servant Leadership was the best label. Since then, they have wholeheartedly adopted it.

All the Colors of the Rainbow

The beautiful part of discovering that Servant Leadership is your approach to leadership, is that as a result of labeling it, you can practice Servant Leadership more consciously and consistently. And as you too, become a daily servant, you begin seeing all the colors of the rainbow manifesting around you.For me, it begins with those primary colors — empathy, listening, and authenticity. What are the primary colors you are including in  your leadership palette?Graphics: Top photo - artist S.Silver via Dollar Photo Club. Bottom photo - artist Libby Beaty and used by permission. 

Why I Gave Up on the Purpose-Driven Life

I quit. That’s right. I gave up on the purpose-driven life. Please read on before writing me off as a heretic.Chances are good that you have a copy of Rick Warren’s bestselling book, The Purpose Driven Life. You may have even read it. I remember reading it shortly after it was first published in 2002. Even now, I still recall wondering what was wrong with me because I didn’t get as excited about it as many of my friends did.Don’t get me wrong. This is in no way a personal attack on Rick Warren, nor should it be construed as such.While I’ve never met Rick, I like, admire, and respect him. Greatly.He’s extremely affable and very down-to-earth. I admire how he has used his influence and affluence (his words) as a catalyst for to mobilize church, community, and business leaders to compassionate responses on sensitive issues like AIDS, depression, and suicide.I respect the way he has handled the fame and fortune that came with writing a mega-best seller like The Purpose-Driven Life. Instead of living a lavish lifestyle, he continues living a modest one and has given away massive amounts of money to worthy causes.I only hope to manage fame and fortune as well as he has should it ever come my way.Perhaps what I am most grateful for is how The Purpose Driven Life shone a spotlight on the power of purpose and prompted millions of people to ponder the purpose for their lives.If you know me, you know that I am a huge proponent of purpose. As a matter of fact, the focus of my work in this season of life is encouraging and equipping people to higher purpose living and leading.So what’s your beef, Kevin? And why in the world would you give up on a purpose-driven life?Great question! And let me assure you it has nothing to do with the purpose part and everything to do with the driven part.For most of my life, I’ve been driven by one thing or another.Early on it was escaping bad experiences at a church. At other times, it was fear, success, money, achievement, or recognition that were driving me.If you must be driven, then purpose is one of the better drivers you can have in life. It certainly beats all of those listed above.But what if there is an option to living any kind of driven life?I think there is. Actually, it’s been a bit of an epiphany for me over the past two weeks.I’ve summarized it in with a new four-word mantra: More Led, Less Driven.You can explore my first foray into the More Led, Less Driven life and how I’m approaching life differently in a guest post I wrote for my friend and mentor Ray Edwards.While I’ve given up on the purpose-driven life, I haven’t given up on either purpose or life. I’m just done being driven. I’m trading in my purpose-driven life for one led by higher purpose.Will you join me?

Daring To Find Higher Purpose Beyond Crippling Disappointment

Again? Seriously? It’s that gnawing feeling. Those recurring thoughts you hate.You know the ones:

• It’s too late for you.
• You’ve stayed in that job too long.
• You’ve made too many mistakes.
• You’ve wasted too much time.
• You played it safe for so long
• You let your best years slip away.
• You’ve burned too many bridges.
• You’ve lost hope of your life ever changing.
• If it weren't for all of those mistakes.

When you hear talk of purpose in life, you think that’s just for the under 30 crowd. You know, those who still have plenty of time. Whose prime of life is still in the future.Or it’s the overachievers who have it all together.You know the ones who haven’t made as many mistakes as you have made. They haven’t  squandered the opportunities you have. They are yet to know the disappointments and devastation you’ve known.That purpose stuff is for those “perfect people” with the “perfect families”, the “perfect jobs” and the “perfect life".Oh poppycock! 

It's Not Too Late!

Whoever you are, wherever you may be right now as you read this. Even if you are able to read this and someone is reading it to you, there’s still time for you. Time to find…and fulfill your higher purpose in life.Yes indeed.Your failures, or the failures of others that were forced on you haven’t disqualified you from living a life of higher purpose.Actually, it’s quite the opposite. Take my friend Tiffany. She was abused as a child — certainly that was not anything of her own choosing or doing. She could have checked out in life. Been a victim and lived into that victim identity.Instead, she realized the pain of her past uniquely equipped her with insights, understanding, and compassion that  allow her to connect with children currently living in similar circumstances and situations.Today, she and her family, lead an orphanage in Guatemala and care for 80 girls rescued out of similar situations. Tiffany now realizes that the love that has filled her heart and life is her greatest asset for serving others.[Tweet "You are not defined by your past. Rather, you have been refined by it."]Just because you’ve been knocked down, doesn’t mean it’s over.

My Dark Season

Let me take you back to perhaps the darkest season of my life. I left a great job with a Fortune 50 company just six months after finally landing my dream job. You see, that dream job wasn’t all I had dreamed it would be.I had friends who were in the early phases of a promising high-tech start-up. I jumped ship. I walked away from a secure jog and a promising career. No bed of roses either.Within six months the bubble burst. The economy collapsed. Our start-up folded. Jobs were disappearing. People and companies filed record numbers of bankruptcies.I was hosed.In eight short months, we went from being in the best financial position of our married life to being in the worst. Yes, I said we, for I took my family with me on that ride. I didn’t drag them, they went willingly. And supportively.I was out of work for an extended period of time. Broke. Humiliated. Hopeless. Strapped. Angry. Perhaps worst of all, Isolated.And then it got worse. After a couple of months of rejection and unemployment that depression kicked in. Those were long, dark days and longer, darker nights.I wish I could tell you that everything changed overnight. That wouldn’t be the truth. That’s not how it was for me.What I can tell you that is true is that overnight, everything began to change.

To Risk or Not To Risk

I still remember visiting a church service with a friend. That day, the sermon was on faith. The pastor said, you could spell faith, RISK. Later in the sermon he said,[Tweet "For some of you, the greatest risk you will ever take, is to take no risk at all."]Bullseye! He was talking to me. I may not have been the only one he was talking to. But he was talking to me.You see, my failures had closed me off to risking anything. Ever. Again.I had determined to play it safe. To never ever do anything that involved any degree of risk again.[Tweet "The walls I had erected to protect me, had now become my prison."]The restlessness wouldn’t leave me alone. I wasn’t content playing it safe or small. It’s not how I was wired.It was bad enough that I wasn’t making a difference for anyone. What was worse was I wasn’t even making many dollars either. It was a desolate and desperate place.At that moment I made a decision. A decision that I would be willing to take risks agains. Actually, I think I realized I had to take risks again. As Marianne Williamson put it, “Your playing small does not serve the world.”While I may not be able to relate to your specific journey or circumstances. I have known disappointment, discouragement, and disenchantment. Actually, they still show up on a regular basis. More often than not, I recognize them and send them on their way.There’s more to my story, maybe I’ll share it later. There’s more to your story too.

Start Writing Your Next Chapter...NOW

Your current situation, however difficult or dire it may be, does not have to the final chapter of your life. I invite you. Actually, I implore you, dream again!Be willing to risk. To reach within and discover your unique contribution to the world and the next step to take to bring it to life.Silence those nagging notions that it’s too late for you by taking action right now! Download The 5 Questions You Must Answer to Align Yourself With Your Higher Purpose. Invest the time for introspection to discover your answers to these five questions. Then commit to taking a next step. It doesn’t have to be the perfect next step. You simply need to move. Forward.Find someone to talk to. Someone with whom to discuss your answers to these questions.Buy Profiles of Purpose: Stories of High Achievers Who Chose a Higher Purpose and read the stories of others, like Tiffany, who chose to find and fulfill their higher purpose in life.  

How to Find Your Life's Purpose...One Day, One Step At a Time

 We love the idea of overnight success. Let’s face it, many of us may even harbor dreams of one day being an overnight success.We imagine stepping onto the stage, the big screen, or the red dot and in just a moment — 3 minutes of a song, 5 minutes of an interview, or 17 minutes of a TED Talk, we instantly become an overnight success. Instantly, we are transported from obscurity to having our own hashtag (#Kev — catchy, eh?)Really? Is that how it happens?Is that how you imagine living into your life’s purpose? One day, you just magically step into your destiny.Or it that the myth we hold on to?

Gradually, Then Suddenly

Perhaps Ernest Hemingway’s brilliant description of how people go bankrupt also applies to how we find and fulfill our purpose and destiny in life. When asked how people go bankrupt, Hemingway said, “Two ways. Gradually, then suddenly.”Think about it. Yes, there is a specific point in time people declare bankruptcy, but they were on the journey for months or even years leading up to that moment of “sudden” bankruptcy. It doesn’t happen overnight.[Tweet "Gradually, then suddenly, is how most of us discover our life’s purpose."]Consider this, even Jesus spent 30 years in relative obscurity before stepping onto the world stage. I imagine his life included some mundane moments working away in his father’s carpenter shop.I believe the same is true for how we find and fulfill our purpose in life.We don’t just wake up one morning and shazaam our life’s purpose happened overnight — while we were sleeping. On Monday life was dull, aimless, and unfulfilled only to awaken on Tuesday and “poof” we’re transported into a life filled with meaning and purpose.[Tweet "We live our way into life purpose one day, one decision at a time."]And for many of us, it’s a long and winding road we travelled to get there.

Profiles of Purpose

In Profiles of Purpose: Stories of High Achievers Who Chose Higher Purpose, I explore the pathways travelled by seven friends on their journeys to finding and fulfilling their higher purpose in life.And guess what? While each of them is a success in their own right, not one of them got there overnight. They each found their life purpose one day, one decision at a time.Get your copy of Profiles of Purpose exclusively from Amazon. As you read it, I trust you’ll be encouraged to take your next step on your journey to your higher purpose in life. If you've not yet downloaded your free copy of The 5 Questions You Must Answer To Align Yourself With Your Higher Purpose, grab it too as it will help you.What's a decision you recently made that helped you align with your life's purpose? Please share it in the comments below.

Which Road Did You Take On Your Way to Higher Purpose

Has your life journey been more of a straight line or a winding road? Given the choice, I’d pick the straight line — more out of my desire for speed and efficiency. Yet, as I look back on the path I’ve traveled, it’s been much more of a (cue the Beatles) The Long and Winding Road.Maybe you can relate to the twists and turns that life often takes. Or maybe you can’t relate, because you’re one of those who knew from kindergarten the path for your life and have beelined your way there without any deviation.

Writing straight with crooked lines

Either way, I hope you’ll read on. If you’ve taken the express route in life, maybe what follows will help you better understand those of us who haven’t. If you’re on the winding road, I hope this helps make sense of the journey you've traveled.Years ago I stumbled upon this saying, God writes straight with crooked lines. The winding path, while not always the most direct route, still leads forward (take another look at the image attached to this post). Often, the ascent of the climb is too much to tackle all at once, so you zig-zag your way up the mountain.Here's a brilliant insight that helped me,[Tweet ""Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards." Søren Kierkegaard."]While we are in the throes of life unfolding, and yes, there are seasons when it seems more like life unravelling, it’s often hard to see any pattern, path, or purpose to the events of our lives.However, when we allow ourselves some room for reflection, and look back over a season, or seasons, of life, we probably see patterns. We may even realize that there was a pathway and that all along the way, we were on the course to discovering our life’s purpose.

How did you get here?

Let me share a story that illustrates this.A few years back, I had facilitated a two-day workshop in Seattle. The workshop had just ended, people had said their goodbyes, and I was packing up before heading out.Just then, I noticed Marcus making his way to the front of the room. He offered to help. Naturally, I accepted his offer.We chatted as we finished packing. It’s one of those conversations that still rings fresh in my ears.

Marcus began, “How did you get trained to do what you do?”

I responded with a bit of nervous laughter.

“Is that a silly question?”, he asked, looking somewhat embarrassed.

“Oh no! Not at all. It’s just that my answer may not be that helpful to you. Why do you ask?”

“Well…” Marcus was a bit timid. Earlier I had learned he was a veteran recovering from PTSD. “I want to do what you do.”

“I’m not sure my answer is what you’re looking for, but it is the truth…Nothing. And everything.”

At that moment, Marcus had that deer-in-the-headlight look, “Huh? I was hoping you could point me to a program or school to learn to do what you do.”

I continued, “Let me explain, nothing in the sense of receiving formal education or specific training to do what I was doing. However, everything I have ever done, in one way or another, has equipped and prepared me to do what I do.”

It clicked. I saw the light begin to shine in his eyes.

“Marcus, I believe all of your life experiences have prepared and equipped you to do something similar to what I do. You need to believe it and launch out to discover just what that is for you.”

Marcus smiled. He understood.

What about you and your path? 

What has your life journey prepared you to do?Can you relate to that nothing and everything comment from my conversation with Marcus? As you look back, can you now see how the dots connected to form a pathway? Are you able to trace straight lines from your crooked path?I sure hope so and I’d love to hear your story. Perhaps you’ll share some of it in a comment below. If you’re still trying to make sense of the path you’re traveling, maybe I can help.I’ve developed a framework, the Higher Purpose Pathway. It’s one of the tools I use to help people discover and fulfill their higher purpose in life. (And I believe we’re all hardwired for higher purpose.)I do this in both one-on-one sessions as well as in small group settings. We begin by mining the riches of your life’s journey to help you discover how you’re wired and what motivates you to make the world a better place.With that understanding in place, we map the path that leads to your ideal future. What’s the difference you dream of making in the world?From there, we muster the resources (including courage) needed to bring your dream to life. Then it’s time to mobilize for action and get you on your way.I’ve developed five-questions to help you get started and take the next step on your Higher Purpose Pathway. It's free! Download them now and carve out time in the next 24 hours to discover where you are, and what the best next steps are for your journey.And of course, I’d love to hear whether your path has been more zig-zag or straight line. Either way, keep living forward.

Pursuing Higher Purpose Globally via Tweetable Moments

Like many of you, I am passionately pursuing purpose in life. Not just any purpose, higher purpose. You know, those of us who actually believe we can make the world a better place. If not the whole world, at least our part of it.Recently, I had the privilege of gathering with 3,000 other passionate pursuers of higher purpose at the HOPE Global Forum. The common higher purpose that united us?  “Creating an inclusive economy that works for all citizens.” You can read why I considered HGF "unbelievably amazing" here.

Tweetable Moments

I know some of you are wondering, exactly what is a tweetable moment? And how do you tweet a moment?For those that ‘get’ Twitter, little explanation is needed. For those that don’t get Twitter — and that’s the larger crowd — I hope I can shed a little light here.Twitter is a social media platform. The real purpose of social media is sharing, not shouting.  It’s an opportunity to connect people — who may not otherwise ever meet — around a cause. However, we all know the shouters who think social media is their global soapbox for pontificating. We also know those who share everything... and wish they wouldn’t.Now, whenever I attend a conference, I am looking for tweetable moments — keen ideas or insights worth sharing with others who may, or may not, be in attendance.That’s accomplished with the use of a hashtag. The “#” with some letters or numbers after it. Following a hashtag allows you to see all of the posts from others who are also tweeting their takeaways.Here’s an example from HOPE Global Forum which was #HGF2016.Early in the conference, John Hope Bryant, founder of Operation HOPE made the comment, “PhDs are good, PhDos are better.” Now that’s tweetable! For starters it falls easily into the 140 character limit for tweets.  It’s also pithy and provocative.[Tweet "PhDs are good; PhDos are better! @JohnHopeBryant."]This tweet also allows room for commentary. Knowledge is necessary, but it must be combined with action to make a meaningful difference. I was amazed to watch how quickly ‘PhDos’ spread and the frequency with which subsequent speakers did a "call back" to the PhDos reference.

#HGF2016 Tweetable Moments

What follows are other Tweetable moments from #HGF2016. I’ve used Click to Tweet to make it easy for you to share your favorites with others. All you have to do is click and share right from the blog post to your Twitter account. I invite you to give it a try and see what happens.[Tweet "You get more out of a conference when you give something to it."][Tweet "The most dangerous person in the world is the person with no hope. #HGF2016 @johnhopebryant"][Tweet "If you hang around with 9 broke people, you'll soon become the 10th. #HGF2016 @johnhopebryant"][Tweet "Cynicism is not the antidote to hopelessness. @ChelseaClinton"][Tweet "#HigherPurpose transcends partisanship and politics."][Tweet "#SocialGood doesn't just happen; it's the result of #leadership decisions + intentional action."][Tweet "Creating #socialgood good is less about WHAT you do and more about HOW you do it. @KatColeATL"][Tweet "Partnering with your community is easy when you have the right partner. #HGF2016 @KatColeATL"][Tweet "Everyone has a strength to share! What is your strength? How are you sharing it? @KatColeATL"][Tweet "You can't have a movement without young people" #HGF2016 @AmbAndrewYoung"][Tweet "You don’t have to have money to be a #philanthropist; you only need a heart. @FrancineLeFrak"][Tweet "Who, in your community, can you share your story with? @KatColeATL"][Tweet "Everybody is somebody's hero. Whose hero are you?@KatColeATL"]

Have a Tweetable Moment to Share?

If you attended HOPE Global Forum and had other takeaways, feel free to add your tweetable takeaway in the comment section below.For your next conference, whether you’re the meeting planner, a speaker, or participant, consider how you can extend the impact of your conference through social media sharing.If you found these Higher Purpose Highlights inspiring and would like to download a printed version, click here.

Unbelievably Amazing! HOPE Global Forum 2016

When was the last time you attended an UNBELIEVABLY AMAZING conference?For me, it was just last week.The conference? Hope Global Forum 2016.What made it unbelievably amazing?The serendipity of several things. Let me share a few of those here. I’ll share more takeaways in future posts.

About Hope Global Forum

Sponsored by Operation HOPE, Hope Global Forum (HGF) is “a community of events that serve as a call to action: to inspire innovation and thought leadership around an inclusive economy that works for all citizens.”

HGF is higher purpose in action.

My personal mission is connecting high achievers to higher purpose. HGF attracts my kind of people for my kind of purpose -  high achievers from all sectors and several countries, each with a passion for making the world better place.There were actors, activists, and athletes engaging together with pundits, politicians, and preachers. It was an environment ripe for serendipity, that is, for experiencing good things not sought after.

How I got to HGF

In two words: “social media.”My favorite social media outlets are LinkedIn and Twitter. Both were instrumental in getting me to HGF.Back in November, I read John Hope Bryant’s book, How the Poor Can Save Capitalism. I tweeted highlights from the book as I went through it on my Kindle. (You can view my Kindle highlights from the book here.) John is the founder of Operation Hope. He responded to my tweets and we forged a connection 140 characters at a time. What a great guy!Then in December, I received a LinkedIn invitation to connect with Louis Enrique Negron, the President of the Atlanta Market Region for Operation HOPE. I accepted and we immediately engaged in deeper dialogue. As with John, a social media connection led to a personal bond. Another great guy!Naturally, when Louis invited me to attend HGF, my enthusiastic response was, “Yes!”So, you see, social media was my onramp to HGF.I believe that social media channels can lead to real relationships. Granted, there are many people who don’t understand that and use their favorite social media channels for self-promotion and pontification. But, don’t let that dissuade you from the really rich relational potential of social media.

Purpose attracts

One of the goals Operation HOPE has for the HGF is to connect people and stimulate partnerships that continue after the Forum.HGF recognizes that:[Tweet "Purpose attracts! The higher the purpose, the stronger the attraction."]While the HGF participants shared a higher purpose, it was certainly a diverse crowd. Diverse in age, experience, profession, political persuasion and passion.In a manner of speaking, HGF served as a great international banquet hall where people of purpose came together to meet, greet and eat.

Meeting, greeting and eating

Those of us who grew up in the southern United States recognizing that combining all three - meeting, greeting and eating - is a great way to begin a friendship.Indeed, at every conference you can meet people and most conferences provide opportunities for greeting, but as I see it, eating is essential for human connection. Through my connection to Louis, I managed an invitation to grab a bit during the “pre-reception reception.”A pre-reception reception. Who knew those existed?To my amazement, serendipity abounded at the pre-reception reception. During that 90 minutes I met purpose-driven people and engaged in several rich conversations over bites of nachos, guacamole, and popcorn.For example, I had a rich conversation on the development of leadership and organizational capacity in the social sector. In another conversation we explored the importance of marketing and messaging to mobilize the masses. Good food, great company, stimulating discussions.

Social media redux: JuJaMa

The HGF organizers used JuJaMa, an online platform and mobile app that facilitated interaction among meeting participants — before, during, and after the forum.I used JuJaMa in advance of HGF to connect with people I knew and to make sure we met while at the conference. I love how JuJaMa integrates social media, especially LinkedIn right into its platform.A pleasant surprise for me - in other words, serendipity - was the number of people with whom I reconnected during the three days. Some, I hadn’t seen in a few months. For others it had been 8 - 10 years since our paths last crossed. But there we were, intersecting again, attracted by higher purpose.And then there was the opportunity to connect on-land with people I have only known online. There were a few of those. This might sound strange to some, but several, of my online relationships are every bit as authentic as those relationships with people whom I see regularly in person.

Chatting and chewing/developing and doing

I love healthy dialogue and robust discussions. I can “chat and chew” for hours.The theme of HGF was “Reimagining the Global Economy” as one that works for everyone — whoever and wherever you are in the world.Included in the program were discussions of policy, showcases of innovative thought and action across all sectors: business, industry, government, arts, education and entertainment. All focusing on what’s being done or could be done to increase opportunity and participation in the global economy.There was plenty to chat and chew about between sessions.But it wasn’t just talking heads and bleeding hearts. It was a call to action. Informed, passionate, purposeful, personal, and professional.Knowledge is essential. But unless knowledge leads to informed action, what good is it?Or as John Hope Bryant put it, [Tweet "@johnhopebryant PhDs are good, PhDos are better."]Here’s one way I spin that:[Tweet "The sooner chat and chew becomes develop and do the better."]

Business-in-a-Box - everyone wins

One primary way that Operation HOPE promotes action is through HOPE Business In A Box. This program provides educational opportunities and mentorship to young entrepreneurs.Friday’s lunch session featured a “Pitch Competition” showcasing four organizations founded by young entrepreneurs putting their learning into practice. The pitches rivaled any you would see on an episode of Shark Tank.The young entrepreneurs wowed the judges and the audience with their entrepreneurship. But unlike Shark Tank, is there were no losers in the Pitch Competition. Each contestant received financial support, technology, and most of all, mentoring.The winner was Alexia of Miniature Chefs. She’s one to follow on her journey.

What’s next after HGF?

Now I’m digging out after three days away at a conference. Following up with phone calls, emails, tweets, and LinkedIn connections. Finding ways to take action on the ideas we explored. While the precise date for next year’s HGF is not yet finalized, the meeting is slated for March in Atlanta and will celebrate 25 years of Operation HOPE. I can’t wait! And I hope to see you there, virtually, and in person.Looking to learn more about Operation HOPE? Check them out via their website or follow them on Twitter (@OperationHOPE).I’m compiling my Tweetable Takeaways from HGF in what I’m calling the Higher Purpose Highlights inspired by Hope Global Forum. I'll share those soon to inspire you on your pursuit of higher purpose.

Destined for Significance, Settling for Success

Have you ever received advice on how to be successful?  Probably, especially if you grew up in the good ole USA. It could have been advice from a relative or the keynote speaker at your graduation — whether college or kindergarten. “What you need to succeed" is always a hot topic for commencement addresses.Perhaps you went searching for advice on “how to be successful”. If so, I hope you had a source other than Google to consult. Or at least, I hope you had a more specific query for your search.  Otherwise you’ve got a lot of reading to do.According to the query I just ran on Google, I found 703,000,000 — thats 703 MILLION sources of advice on how to be successful. That’s a lot of advice! Much of it is questionable. And a whole bunch (technical scientific term) of it is outright bad.

The Quest for Success

How do I know? I’ve heard it, read it, and even practiced it. In case you’re skeptical, let me share this small sampling:

30 Habits You Should Adopt — Seriously, 30. Why not 100? Habits are so easy to adopt. If you accept the data that it takes 21 days to adopt a habit and there are 30 to adopt, that’s only 630 days to secure those habits. Now some “experts” say it takes 66 days for that habit to stick — ugh, that two years extends to 5.5 years.  Good luck with that.

11 Books That Will Teach You to Be Successful — Really? Just 11 books to read.  Wonder if there is any conflicting or confusing advice in those 11 books? If so, how do you know who’s right? Just thinking out loud here.

How I Became Rich Before 30 and How You Can Too — Oops, should have found that one a few years ago. If, like me, and already past 30, just skip that one.

21 Ways to Achieve Wealth and Success — Once again, I appreciate the simplicity of having only 21 more things to master.

6 Things You Should Quit Doing…hope none of those were one of the 30 habits you spent 630 days adopting. And the list goes on.

Trust me, after spending 15 years in corporate sales in a Fortune 50 company, I sat through my fair share of success seminars. I can’t say I’ve heard it all, but I’ve heard most of it. Some of what I heard was nonsense and I immediately dismissed it. Much of it was commonsense that affirmed what I had learned from my parents and teachers.There’s one thing I wish I had heard earlier in life.[Tweet "Success is a poor substitute for significance."]Success may get you to the door of significance, but success alone, won’t get you through the door. What do you mean, Kevin?Well, success may bring you to the place in life where you realize there is more to life than winning the next championship, closing the big deal, acquiring another company, or summiting a higher mountain. Your success in life, in all of the various domains of life, may bring you to the threshold of significance, but success does not guarantee significance.

Four ways significance differs from success

Success is short-lived, significance endures. Records will be broken. Your best performance will, sooner or later, be bested by others. Success always demands more.  It’s amazing to hear of Olympic athletes who just won a Gold medal and set a world record wondering what’s next and if their best day in life is now history. Acts of significance, even if done in obscurity will endure.Success can be a solo quest, significance always involves others. While none of us truly succeeds alone, we need the support and encouragement of others. However, in many arenas, success recognizes the one in the winner circle or the spotlight. And, granted, there are times, winners forget about the others who contributed to their success.Baseball legend, Jackie Robinson offered a keen insight. “A life isn't significant except for its impact on other lives.” You can’t be significant in isolation. In some way, directly or indirectly, you must make an impact on others to truly be significant.Success results from striving, significance results from serving.  No doubt that long hours, consistent effort, and hard work are necessary for success. Success is often focused on self — honing your skills, developing your talents, sharpening your abilities. The path to significance is found through serving. Serving is the giving of your time, resources, and self on behalf of others.Success is achieved, significance is bestowed. You earn success by accomplishing goals, shattering records, or besting the competition (with yourself or others). And you can demonstrate your success by your achievements. However, you can’t climb or earn your way to significance. It’s bestowed on you by others for the benefit they have received from your contribution to their life, organization, or community. I applaud your drive and desire to succeed. At the same time, I encourage you to consider the higher purpose your success makes possible — for you and others.

If you're destined for significance, why settle for success?

[Tweet "Don't settle for success when you're destined for significance."] If you’re looking for help identifying your higher purpose, I’ve got five questions for you to ask and answer to get you started and you can access them below.Want more help? Let’s connect on a call and get you plugged into our next group event or even a one-on-one if you can’t wait.

How To Dial In On Your One Thing

“What’s the ONE Thing you can do such that by doing it everything else will be easier or unnecessary?”That’s the BIG question Gary Keller poses in his New York Times bestseller The ONE Thing.Pat Flynn suggested I read the book. I did. Honestly, I’m still struggling to make this work as an organizing principle for my work.Why is that?Well, there are so many things vying for my time and attention. It’s easy to flit from one thing to another and I was taught to create to-do lists, LONG lists.Heck, there were many days when I started making my list, that I would put 2 or 3 things on it that I had already done just so I could experience the joy of checking them off. Some of you know what I mean. I’ve seen you do it too.Come what may, at the end of the day I can look back at all of the check marks on my list and get some sense of satisfaction of having accomplished something. After all, look at all of those checkmarks!Can you relate?

You Were Made For More Than Checking Things Off!

That’s how many people approach life. We fill our days, nights, and weekends with lots of activities. We may not be making real progress towards any worthwhile goal, but gosh darn it, look at all of the things we did!So we flit from one thing to the next.

• Make sure you get the kids to the practice on time!
• Don’t miss this week’s game!
• Oh, did you pick up refreshments for the meeting?
• Did we get that dinner with the Jones’ scheduled?
• Remember, we’ve got that birthday party for Susan on Sunday afternoon.
• You did call your Mom this week, didn’t you?
• What time is the PTA meeting this week? This week? I thought it was next week!

Oh, and then there’s that deadline on the BIG project at work. And the potluck at church.  And I promised to take the kids skating this week. I don’t know about you, but I’m ready for a nap. Don’t have time for a nap? Just hit me up with a triple shot espresso.Most of us are so busy doing so many things, who could possibly squeeze one more thing into your schedule? Into your life?A common response — What do you mean ONE thing? I’ve got a million things! STOP! This is insane! And I’m not just talking about this post. I’m talking about this lifestyle.

We’ve gone from “s/he who dies with the most toys wins” to “s/he with the busiest schedule is the most fulfilled.”

REALLY? Recall these words I love from Gandhi, “Speed is irrelevant if you’re going in the wrong direction.”Sprinkle this in from Socrates, “The unexamined life is not worth living.”WOW! Who cares how many things you get done, if the things you’re doing are trivial and meaningless? Why bother cramming one more thing to an overfull life that is void of fulfillment?Instead, simplify. Rather than trying to do it all, focus on doing what matters most.And when do you suggest I have time to do that, Kevin?Well, this is important enough that I suggest you begin carving out time. Even 5 minutes — 5 undistracted minutes will help. Begin by discovering the unifying theme of your higher purpose in life. Yes, you have a higher purpose in life. I believe you have ONE thing that matters more to you than all of the other little things in life.Don’t misinterpret me here. I’m not saying you have ONE, and only ONE thing in ALL of your life and that it never changes. I am suggesting there is ONE things that matters more than much of the clutter you’ve collected. Dialing in on that ONE things brings clarity and focus to the other things.

Here are 5 questions to help you dial in on the ONE thing that matters most in this season of your life.

The ONE thing that at the end of your a week, a month, a year, even a lifetime, you can look back on and find great fulfillment in having done.

1. What’s ONE thing you never grow weary of doing? Actually, instead of getting tired, you are energized by doing it?
2. What’s ONE thing that riles you up faster than anything else? Is it a social justice issue? An issue of equality or inequality?
3. Is there ONE group of people (or place) for whom you are most concerned for or committed to serving?
4. If you interviewed 5 people who know you well and asked them, “What’s ONE thing I do best or better than most?” Would you find a common theme in their answers?
5. What’s the ONE dent in the universe you want to make?

As you reflect on your answers to these questions, is there ONE thing that stands out to you?Perhaps that’s the ONE thing you want to accomplish in life so that having accomplished it, or at least invested your best energies and efforts in it, you’re living a life worth living. A life pursuing your higher purpose.

Hardwired For A Higher Purpose: Yes, You

You are on a quest. As am I. It's great that our paths have crossed at this time in our respective journeys.All of humanity is invited to join this quest.  Viktor Frankl called it the search for meaning. Yes, deep inside, we want to believe life has meaning and purpose. That it’s no accident that we’re here and that there’s more to life than bumbling and stumbling through it.It’s not enough to believe there is meaning and purpose to life in some broad,  generic sense. Each of us wants to believe there is meaning and purpose to our life.You want to believe it’s true for you, just as much as I do for me. And you want to discover, embrace, and fulfill your life’s purpose.We don’t want to be spectators, simply sitting on the sidelines or in the stands watching others as they live magnanimous lives of adventure and purpose while we muddle through the monotony and mediocrity of a mundane existence.Frankl had a label for that too. He called it the existential vacuum. The zombie-like state of bouncing from one activity to the next in hopes of drowning out the longings and emptiness we might otherwise have to acknowledge.And Frankl observed this boredom at a time when most televisions had only three channels. Of black and white pictures at that. News? It was delivered twice a day rather than every minute of every day.But that’s not the kind of person you are.You are one who has been awakened or aroused out of this existential vacuum and you are searching for answers or, at least, clues to the specific meaning of your life. And once you discover that meaning, you won’t be content until you find ways to live it out.

The Second Most Important Day of Your LIFE

There’s a great line attributed to Mark Twain, “The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.” Day one? Check! Yes you are alive.Day Two? Hold that thought for a moment, please.Solomon, highly regarded by many for his great wisdom, declared that God set eternity in the hearts of men and women. C.S. Lewis expounded on that a bit by saying, “If I find in myself desires which nothing in this world can satisfy, the only logical explanation is that I was made for another world.”Eternity in our hearts? Really? What does that mean? How can it fit?It means we have desires that aren’t satisfied simply by doing more, having more, or achieving more. These desires require us to become more.I see this as part and parcel of our search for meaning. It’s discovering the design and the designer of life. I call it higher purpose. We are all invited to higher purpose living. Living for something more and something beyond me, myself, and I.You are meant for more, but what more were you meant for?So what about your second most important day that Twain mentioned?

Discovering the why of your life. How do you do that?

That’s the quest. It’s what I call the Higher Purpose Pathway. And if you’re still reading, I’ve got great news for you. You’ve already begun the journey!Asking questions, coupled with a willingness to wrestle with your answers to those questions (and then acting on what you find) are essential elements. These help you unlock the doors and facilitate the discovery of who you are, why you are here, what your unique contribution to the world is, and the people or people groups you want to serve.The clues are abundant. As a matter of fact, they are all around and in you. You are uniquely made. There is no one else exactly like you. Even if you’re an identical twin.You are endowed with gifts talents, and abilities — strengths and skills. Your passions and perspectives are uniquely yours. What gives you great joy, what riles you up and gets your juices flowing — it’s all unique to you and revealing about you.Your specific journey, perspective, and life experiences make you one-of-a-kind.Besides that, there are some people (or people groups) for whom you have a soft spot in your heart. They are your others. The people for whom you want to make the world, or their world, a better place.

Higher purpose always includes someone else.

Jackie Robinson put it like this, "A life is not important except in the impact it has on other lives.” You are not the center of the universe. Who is your other? Whose world do you long to impact?I want to help you discover the higher purpose of your life and the best next step for you to take to live into your higher purpose. I’ve got a resource to help on your quest. It’s five powerful questions to illuminate your path.Up and to the right is where you can download your free copy. Carve out 5 - 10 minutes to begin answering the five questions. You can complete it electronically or print it out and complete it manually. The key is finding your answers to these questions and taking your next step.Do it now. Take a bold step into your bright future. Discover the purpose you are hardwired to fulfill.

"He knew my name!" Big Deal?

Who were those who helped shape your understanding of leadership? Specifically, how did they do that?Those questions framed a discussion I led last week with a group of 32 leaders from around the world in the Leadership Institute Master Class (LIMC) for Project Management Institute (PMI). LIMC is a yearlong personal and professional development journey sponsored by PMI that encourages and equips leaders for greater effectiveness.For the past two years, I have had the privilege of serving alongside my friend, Aileen Ellis, to co-facilitate the three-day leadership intensive that launches this journey. In the, “Discovering the Leader IN You” session, I guided Master Class members through three guided reflections on what it means to be a leader and to lead well.In the opening, we explore the first leaders we encountered and how did those encounters shape our understanding of leadership.It’s often enlightening to consider the roots of how our leadership perceptions. Indeed, the discussion at LIMC that totally WOWED me last week.After exploring how our group first learned leadership, I teed up the discussion by encouraging participants to, “Think about a leader you admire — it can be someone you know personally, a leader from history, or someone on the world stage.”

First impressions, lasting encounters.

As I floated around the room, I heard two stories worth repeating.Beth Rick from Ohio shared of an encounter she had five years ago when she spent a day serving as host and handler for General Colin Powell when he was in Columbus to keynote the Professional Development Day for PMI Central Ohio Chapter.Beth shared how nervous she was as she anticipated spending the whole day with a person of such power and stature. She wondered, “Will he be intimidating?”After all, he was a four-star general in the United States Army, had served as Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, and the US Secretary of State.And then there was the limo.Apparently, General Powell’s speaker’s bureau inserted a provision in his contract that he be picked up in a limo.Beth didn’t know what to expect.But as it turned out, General Powell was a kind and compassionate man who immediately put her at ease. Maybe it was his quip about, “What? Are we going to the prom?” when he saw the limo.And he was genuinely interested in her as person and a great conversationalist.She was struck by his authenticity and how, throughout the day, he made it a point of recognizing all the people who crossed their path who were doing what many might consider “insignificant jobs”. You know, the servers, whether they were serving food, cleaning facilities, or attending to the AV. General Powell recognized them and thanked them for their service.

Leadership at its best!

Next, Merete Munch Lange from Norway was recounting an experience from the process of joining her current employer, Sopra Steria.Between the time she had received the job offer and her official start date, she was invited to attend a special company meeting. Imagine her surprise when Thomas, the firm's Managing Director and her bosses' boss, sought her out, addressed her by name and said, “We’re excited to have you join us.”Her response? “He knew my name.” I had not yet met him, I don’t even work here yet, and he knows me by name!As we sat in last week’s LIMC session, more than 18 months had passed since Merete had that experience. Yet when prompted to reflect on leaders she admired and why, that seemingly insignificant event was top of her mind.What had that encounter communicated to Merete?That she mattered. That she was viewed as a valuable member of the team, a key contributor. It validated her. As a person.That simple act — welcoming her by name — was a big deal!

Little things matter most.

Merete’s story underscored the importance of connecting with people as individuals. Seeing them, knowing them, and calling them by name.One of the primary things I’ve learned in my work developing leaders— little things matter most. Never underestimate the power of connecting with people as individuals. In my experience, the best leaders connect with everyone on your team by name.Without you even knowing it, your seemingly insignificant act may actually shape the understanding of what it means to be a great leader for people in your life like Beth and Merete.