BLOGS & RESOURCES
The Power of Gratitude with Steve Foran and Lilian Jans Beken
One of today's guests is Steve Foran, the founder and CEO of Gratitude At Work, and the Forum Chair at MacKay CEO Forums. Steve’s mission is to shift corporate culture by helping companies bring gratitude to work each day. He’s accompanied by Lilian Jans Beken, who is a speaker, writer, researcher, and the founder and CEO of the Thriving Human Science Center. Lilian is often referred to as Dr. Gratitude because of her PhD in positive psychology. They both feature as the first guest speakers on this pilot episode of This Extraordinary Life.
Being extraordinary and living an extraordinary life is a matter of choice and not chance. You already have everything you need to live this extraordinary life. In this exciting new podcast, Kevin Monroe provides listeners with the tools to maximize their life’s full potential by having stimulating, insightful conversations with highly successful professionals in various industries.
You’ll hear Kevin chat with Steve and Lilian about:
- What gratitude means to them.
- How gratitude helps you cope with difficult situations.
- How gratitude affects your perspective.
- The physiological benefits of practicing gratitude.
- How we can dig deep to find gratitude when it seems impossible.
Sandy Anderson and Rachel Drukenmiller of the This Extraordinary Life community share stories of how gratitude has recently impacted their lives.
Resources
Steve Foran on LinkedIn | Twitter
Lilian Jans Beken on LinkedIn | Twitter
The Final Episode
The Higher Purpose Podcast is being rebranded and refocused into the This Extraordinary Life Podcast. As part of the transition, we are replaying some of the episodes that have resonated deeply with Kevin and you, the audience. In this final episode - a replay of Episode 3 - Kevin thanks listeners for tuning in to the Higher Purpose Podcast as he wraps up the series. He shares a story about three allies in his quest to a higher purpose and expresses his gratitude for their impact in his life.
One of the themes that we are going to be returning to again and again is the idea of the 7 people who enter your life and make a huge impact on your journey to finding your purpose.
There are certain people who you will meet in your life, who are going to make a huge difference for you in different ways. They will impact how you think and feel, and what you do.
These people may appear once in a lifetime, or regularly. They may be in your life for a long time, or for only a brief window – no matter what kind of relationship you have with them – they are going to matter.
Here’s a quick list of the roles these people play in your life:
- Awakener – who alerts you to your purpose
- Doubter – who questions your worth
- Encourager – who encourages and has confidence in you
- Hero – who inspires and models greatness
- Mentor – who you have a close and trusting relationship with
- Critic – who thwarts your progress
- Ally – who supports and helps you
Even though some of these people can cause you pain – they are ALL instructive and necessary to help you connect with your purpose. For those that bring you comfort and joy – tell them!
Resources
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
The Power of Self-Compassion with Laurie Cameron
The Higher Purpose Podcast is being rebranded and refocused into the This Extraordinary Life Podcast. As part of the transition, we are replaying some of the episodes that have resonated deeply with Kevin and you, the audience. This week’s replay is Episode 134 with Laurie Cameron.
Laurie Cameron, founder of PurposeBlue and bestselling author of The Power of Self-Compassion, talks with Kevin Monroe about the benefits of mindfulness and the journey to self-compassion, as well as the hurdles one might come across on that journey.
The Inner Critic
Laurie shares a disheartening experience with someone in which her trust was broken. Her first thought was critical of herself and the red flags she ignored: her “inner critic” had reared its head. The inner critic is part of our biology and is there to protect us to ensure we survive both physically and emotionally, Laurie says. The first step in practicing self-compassion is not ignoring the inner critic, but acknowledging it and moving past the cognitive analysis of the hurtful event.
Shifting Your Perspective
Laurie communicates that some of our feelings of being hurt are due to a narrative that we tell ourselves. Mindfulness training helps you to observe your narratives, and analyze how you interpret others’ actions and intentions. Only then would you be able to shift your perspective to objectively understand your situation and avoid miscommunication.
Touch as Self Care
Kevin quotes from Laurie’s book, “Touch activates the physiology of care,” and comments that he hadn’t considered an individual’s touch to themselves falling under that category. He now realizes that you can apply the physiology of care to yourself. Laurie adds that the tool of touch is one of many approaches to practicing self-compassion and is a primal development of our biology.
I’m Not That Voice
We’re born with a negativity bias that has good intentions - to protect us - but is counterproductive as it creates a fixed mindset which is demotivating and stunts growth. The voice may be more dominant in individuals conditioned to be critical. We may associate our identity with that negative inner voice instead of seeing certain behaviors and patterns as transient. Thankfully, Laurie conveys, we can recondition or unlearn the negative voice and relearn a positive voice.
Self-Compassion is Not Self-Esteem
Self-esteem is tied to ranking, rating, and comparison to others. Comparison has caused much emotional suffering and loneliness in society. On the other hand, self-compassion has nothing to do with metrics; it’s all about how we see and treat ourselves in the moment. Laurie offers some insight and practical tips on how to practice self-compassion. She hopes that people can engage in mindfulness, self-awareness, and self-acceptance. Mindfulness is accepting that life is messy and mistakes are normal, she adds. It’s the practice of accepting what is and amplifying the good.
Resources
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
Are You Listening? with Jane Adshead-Grant
The Higher Purpose Podcast is being rebranded and refocused into the This Extraordinary Life Podcast. As part of the transition, we are replaying some of the episodes that have resonated deeply with Kevin and you, the audience. This week we are revisiting Episode 117 with Jane Adshead-Grant.
Executive coach and author of Are You Listening or Just Waiting to Speak, Jane Adshead-Grant is the guest on today’s show. She shares deep insights about listening with host Kevin Monroe, including why she discourages note-taking during conversations.
Don’t Take Notes
Kevin often creates some questions to ask podcast guests as a springboard to their conversation. While they are speaking, he jots down notes so that he remembers important points or ideas he wants to revisit. Jane discourages this practice. She says that instead of taking notes, he should trust himself. When you listen deeply, you’re allowing the speaker to continue to think and speak at their very best. You will remember the essential elements of what they said, she assures Kevin. To listen deeply, you must first be at ease with yourself as the listener; you must know that both speaker and listener have equal capacity to think, listen and share; and you must appreciate each other for the qualities that you see in one another.
The Gift of Time
Kevin asks what listeners can do to be more present in the conversation. Jane advises them to give themselves the gift of this time, free from judgment, distraction, and interruption. Distraction can be both internal and external, she says. An example of internal distraction is when your mind wanders; she advises that you should mentally check yourself when this happens and bring your focus back to the conversation. The most common external distraction is the phone: just put it on silent. When you actively give your attention - paying attention is more passive and reactive, Jane says - you’re giving respect to the other person. You’re saying that in this moment they are more important than anything else.
Let Silence Do the Heavy Lifting
Jane writes in her book that we should let silence do the heavy lifting. Kevin asks her to unpack that statement. She explains that people need time to process questions or information. Giving them the opportunity to pause while they process their thoughts is a real gift. Humans think in waves and pauses: we have a wave of thinking, and then we naturally pause. If we allow that silence for long enough, the brain itself will soar once more in a new way, Jane says.
Don’t Interrupt
The brain receives an interruption like an assault, Jane reveals. One of the greatest things we can do is resist the urge to interrupt and allow the person to complete their thoughts, feelings, and ideas. Interrupting prevents the person from flourishing into who they are meant to become. If you absolutely must interrupt, you should do it as gracefully as possible, while the person takes a pause. If you inadvertently interrupt someone, apologize.
Listening is a Gift
Jane reminds us that listening is a gift that is worth mastering because it shows how much you care. When you listen to someone to generate their best thinking, it frees them to be more, to create more, to feel more courageous. Whereas time is the currency of leadership, listening is the currency of relationship.
Resources
Jane on LinkedIn | Facebook | Twitter | YouTube | Instagram
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
Replay: The Power of Onlyness with Nilofer Merchant
The Higher Purpose Podcast is being rebranded and refocused into the This Extraordinary Life Podcast. As part of the transition, we are replaying some of the episodes that have resonated deeply with Kevin and you, the audience. This week we are revisiting Episode 142 with Nilofer Merchant, a conversation Kevin describes as one of the most pivotal in his journey.
Nilofer Merchant is a famous author and speaker for TED Conferences. Her most recent book, The Power of Onlyness, talks about worthiness and the connected individuality of all human beings. She joins Kevin Monroe to discuss her book and how the principles in it apply to current events.
The New Normal
Nilofer talks about the things people are doing to help those in need. People now have the voice to create change, she says. She gives an example of altruism that arose due to the coronavirus, and states that society may come to the point where we realize our fates are linked rather than ranked or separated. She ponders on the possibility of the care with which we treat others and the connectivity we have established becoming the new normal. Onlyness’ role in this is to be the combination of voice and belonging that creates real change and lasting connection between people.
Making a Difference
There are people who feel like they should be doing more. Part of their struggle is that they think they need to do something of a grander scale to make a difference. All they need to do is care for the person next to them, Kevin says. He shares a story from a children’s book about contribution, explaining that even the smallest thing makes a difference. Nilofer adds that whatever you pay attention to grows, so if you focus more on having a grand plan rather than actually showing love, it’s counteractive. Center on what you know and what you can do right in the moment, and the rest will take care of itself.
Onlyness
Nilofer defines onlyness as the source of all ideas and innovation. Onlyness is contrary to the traditional hierarchy of worthy contribution, and holds an egalitarian view that everyone has something of value to add to the world. We have been conditioned to believe that our level of capability relies solely on measures such as level of education, but that is a lie, Nilofer says. For example, we now realize how dependent we are on grocery store workers, a position that has historically been considered low-skilled. They are part of a system that feeds us, which allows us to exist and do our creative work. Contribute, don’t compare.
Part of A System
When you enter a room, your light illuminates the entire space. This makes it difficult to discern your own ‘only’ because the light you shine is also the filter you see the world through. Here is where others come in to help you, as they have the perspective to see the difference in the world when you are present and absent. The meaning of individual is the smallest measure of humankind, so even alone, you are never disconnected.
Parking Your Fears
Nilofer says she has to park her fears in order to be present for a conversation. Fear always demands to be heard and gets louder the more it is ignored. She believes fear acts as a signal, like every other emotion. It doesn’t have to rule you, but you need to pay attention to it.
Hope Is A Bridge
“Hope is a thing with others that perches in the soul and sings the tune without the words and never stops at all,” Nilofer quotes. She shares a past experience in which she thought hope was something lightweight, but now she defines it as the bridge we have to walk across in order to get to a new future. She believes that unity happens because two people are both going toward the same thing together.
Resources
Nilofer Merchant on LinkedIn | Twitter | Instagram | Facebook
The Power of Onlyness: Make Your Wild Ideas Mighty Enough to Dent the World
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
What Will it Take to Go All-in on this Extraordinary Life?
In this solo episode of the Higher Purpose Podcast, Kevin Monroe speaks to listeners about his journey during the past 5 years. He shares journal entries documenting his struggle for inspiration and creativity, and the questions which led to discoveries.
Kevin describes an interaction with a colleague that caused him to have an epiphany. After pondering about his purpose, his colleague proposed that he was already fulfilling it. He talks about playing it safe in his professional life by spreading his energy evenly into all his projects. He was “making a millimeter of progress in a million directions rather than going far in one direction.”
You already have everything you need to live this extraordinary life. Instead of framing, “What if I go all-in on this extraordinary life?” as a rhetorical or theoretical question, Kevin used it as a clarifying question for all facets of business. This prompted the rebranding of the Higher Purpose Podcast to This Extraordinary Life podcast. Kevin details the changes and new features expected to come with the rebranding.
This Extraordinary Life is expected to launch between late August and early September.
Resources
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
The Extraordinary You with Emily Elrod
Emily Elrod is the President of Workzbe, an organization dedicated to helping clients create optimal environments for people to bring their authentic selves to work. She joins Kevin Monroe to discuss what makes people extraordinary, as well as how our thoughts influence our behaviors.
Everyone’s Extra
We are all ordinary people, but what sets us apart is our “extras.” Extra is defined by Emily as a gift or calling unique to each individual. Sometimes we only recognize or identify our extras when other people point them out to us. We often undervalue them because they come so easily to us that we think of them as things everyone can do. That which you are gifted to do, you do not understand; you cannot deconstruct it and teach it to other people because you do it naturally, Kevin quotes.
The Little Things
People are hung up on the idea that your extras need to be extravagant and large to set you apart, but in reality, the cumulative effect of the little things unique to you is what brings the extra to the ordinary and transcends you to extraordinary.
The Power of Thoughts and Feelings
Thoughts trigger biochemical secretions that generate emotional responses, or feelings. The nature of these thoughts, whether positive or negative, affect the subsequent emotional response. According to Emily, 97% of our decisions are made off of feelings. We like to think we are logical in our decisions making, Kevin remarks, but almost every buying decision we have ever made has been an emotional decision, which we then use logic to justify. Emily describes her background and how she learned the importance of addressing her feelings through her experiences.
Killing the ANTs
A step to breaking bad habits and behaviors is addressing our thoughts by killing the ANTs. ANTs are Automatic Negative Thoughts, which correlate to the negativity bias instilled in all of us, Emily says. Think of your automatic negative thought as an ant you need to squash. Start by acknowledging the thought, and questioning why it is there.
Failure is Not the Antithesis of Success
Failure is a process of success, Emily argues. If you don’t fail then you won’t succeed. Most of us think that success or failure is about the final outcome, Kevin adds. Rather, failure is part of the journey to success, not its antithesis.
Kevin quotes a response he received to the question of what makes life extraordinary. “For me,” he says, “it is to continue to seek and create harmony. When I am in harmony, there are four things that are aligned: what I do; what I think; what I say; and how I feel. In those moments, things flow without a sense of agitation, tension, or stress.”
Resources
Emily Elrod on LinkedIn
Email: emily@workzbe.com
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
Choose Love with Lucas Skrobot
Lucas Skrobot is an author, podcaster, business owner, and the founder and host of The Lucas Skrobot Show. He joins the Higher Purpose Podcast to discuss moments, opportunities, love, and fear.
In Safe Hands
Lucas shares an experience that reminded him to not take the safety of his family for granted. He thinks about two coordinating realities every day: we are on the precipice of complete disaster and pain in our daily lives, yet there is comfort in that we are not in control and someone is always watching over us.
Hidden Extraordinary Opportunities
Ordinary events have the opportunity to be much more than just mundane moments, Kevin says. He prompts Lucas to share another experience, in which he made a choice to help someone in need even though his best interest was to carry on his way. He stepped into something extraordinary by responding to an ordinary opportunity, Kevin remarks. It was a divine appointment that, though it was planned for him, he could have elected to ignore. This is why fatalism and/or passive faith can be fatal, Lucas says. We are slothful in our hoping and expect that if something is meant to happen, it will magically manifest. He speaks about the impact that experience had on his life.
Love versus Fear or Love & Fear?
Lucas describes an experiment that sought to discover whether gain or fear was the bigger motivator, by using rats in a maze with cheese before them and the scent of a cat behind them. The results revealed that the simultaneous presence of both gain and fear motivated the rats more than just gain or just fear. Kevin references the work of Elisabeth Kubler-Ross on love and fear being the only two primary emotions. We often try to make binary choices, he says, as though we can shut off one or the other. If we are solely motivated by fear, then we will be reactionary in nature, Lucas adds. However fear reminds us that there is always something at stake. Furthermore, love propels us towards a goal. They can both be present at the same time.
Identity and Truth
Lucas believes the reason young people search so desperately for identity and purpose is to find freedom. Though there is agency on the outside, they don’t feel free on the inside, and so equate freedom with purpose, identity and destiny. Only the truth will set you free, he advises, and the truth is love. You don’t need to have a platform to make a monumental dent in the universe; you just need to love the people right in front of you.
Kevin urges listeners to choose to be kind and show love in a world full of choices.
Resources
Lucas Skrobot on LinkedIn | Instagram
Call or text Lucas: 202-922-0220
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111
Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
An Infusion of Gratitude with Kerry Wekelo
Kerry Wekelo is an author and the Chief Operating Officer of the Culture Infusion program for Actualize Consulting. Her most recent book, Gratitude Infusion: Workplace Strategies for a Thriving Organizational Culture, is a practical guide to implementing action plans that improve the work climate. She joins Kevin Monroe to discuss her book and how its principles apply.
Gateway to Abundance
Gratitude is the gateway to abundance, Kevin says. It is easier to focus on what we lack or what we’ve lost due to our negativity bias. However, no amount of regret changes the past and no amount of anxiety changes the future, but any amount of gratitude has the power to change your present. Shifting one’s mindset towards gratitude during challenging periods can relieve feelings of negativity, Kerry advises. There is always something to be grateful for. She describes an experience in which expressing gratitude for someone she considered a friend enabled her to repair their relationship, which was interrupted by feelings of hurt.
What Gratitude Does
Life challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, but rather, help you discover who you are. Focusing on gratitude allows you to move forward into being the best version of yourself. Kerry urges listeners who may be experiencing difficulties in their personal and professional lives to practice gratitude by connecting with people that inspire them. People want to do a good job, she adds, and they will be more motivated to put more effort into their work if they feel genuinely appreciated. You can start by finding one person on your team and expressing your gratitude, emphasizing why they earned it. It will make a difference in the organization. Kerry shares an experience in which she expressed her gratitude to everyone in her company and they doubled their reciprocation of her gratitude.
Infusion
Kevin asks Kerry what infusion means. Kerry defines infusion by using an analogy she learned from her grandmother: when cooking, you do not just add flavor to the food and call it a day. You must layer the flavors so that it is present in every bite. Similarly, gratitude must be a regular practice that is present in every level of an organization. It has to be cultivated and nurtured continuously.
Receiving gratitude is often harder than practicing it. Kevin and Kerry urge listeners to graciously accept gratitude when it is expressed, because it is coming from a place of sincerity that should not be overlooked.
Resources
Kerry Wekelo on LinkedIn | Twitter
Gratitude Infusion: Workplace Strategies for a Thriving Organizational Culture
Episode 118: Infusing Your Company with Culture
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111
Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
This Extraordinary Life
Kevin Monroe continues to discuss living an extraordinary life in this solo episode of the Higher Purpose Podcast.
Anyone Can, But Not Everyone Will
Kevin believes that the act of listening to his podcast shows that listeners are aware that their lives have meaning and purpose, and strive to live an extraordinary life. This extraordinary life is here in the now rather than far in the distance. Anyone can do it regardless of their current circumstances, but not everyone will, he says. Though simple, it is not an easy task. It is available to everyone, but not all will say yes to the invitation, and some are so preoccupied with other things that living an extraordinary life is not one of their pursuits.
Takeaways from the 90-Day Challenge
Kevin talks about the 90-Day “Extraordinary Experiment” challenge and what it taught him. Purpose starves in isolation and thrives in community, he says. An extraordinary life is other-centered, and is best lived with others who are on the same journey. We need one another to inspire, encourage, and lift ourselves up. It is through shared passions, perspectives and experiences between ourselves and others from around the world that we realize there is more that unites us than that which divides us. In addition, we all desire safe spaces where we can freely share our thoughts and ideas.
Deaths of Despair
Kevin discusses “deaths of despair”: deaths during the current global pandemic caused by isolation and feelings of loneliness. These prove that we are designed for community, Kevin says, and crave to be around like-minded people who see our value.
Kevin gives details about a guide to living an extraordinary life: his collaborative project with Debbie LaChusa. He urges listeners to maximize their life’s full potential by not settling for an ordinary life and to inspire others to do the same.
Resources
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111
Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
Episode 152
TheGratitudeChallenge.community
Living an Extraordinary Life (featuring Debbie LaChusa)
Kevin Monroe discusses how to live an extraordinary life in this semi-solo episode of the Higher Purpose Podcast. Debbie LaChusa, an author, blogger, and online instructor joins in to share details about their collaborative project.
It’s Natural
Kevin reads responses from colleagues and listeners to the question of what makes life extraordinary. Being extraordinary and living an extraordinary life is a matter of choice and not chance; it is not contingent on being born with a rare talent or ability. There is an assumption that it is the result of a monumental experience or achievement. “An extraordinary life is made of a myriad of what many may perceive as mundane moments, lived with such fervor and flair that the ordinary things of life are transformed into extraordinary,” Kevin says. We already have what we need to make life spectacular, he adds.
Transform your Life
Debbie joins in to talk about a new course developed by herself and Kevin about how to transform your life from ordinary to extraordinary, as well as what motivated them to start this project. It’s not about being special, she says; it’s about living your life more consciously and intentionally. Additionally, it’s not all about you, but involves the people around you as well.
Kevin extends a promotional offer to listeners: purchase the course within the next 5 days for a discounted price!
Resources
Debbie LaChusa on LinkedIn
ExtraordinaryLifeCourse.com
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
No Time For Silence with Rick Rigsby
Dr. Rick Rigsby is the President and CEO of Rick Rigsby Communications, a motivational speaker, pastor, and best-selling author. He returns to the Higher Purpose Podcast to share his views on the current civil unrest across the US.
This Podcast is a Platform
Many are silent out of fear of saying something wrong, ignorant, or insensitive. Now is not a time to be silent, Kevin Monroe begins. The Higher Purpose Podcast is a platform of responsibility and opportunity, and Kevin sees it as his duty to speak up instead of sitting back and doing nothing.
An Offense to God
The civil unrest in the United States of America is a result of neither political or legislative problems; rather, it is a result of an offense to the heart of God, Rick claims. The Bible calls for love and equality in both the Old and New Testaments. The issues present today are moral issues, rather than issues about specific topics like police and/or race. Rick adds that even during this time of uncertainty and darkness, there are positive things occurring in response. Circumstances are never completely bad, he says. There are always opportunities for growth and improvement.
The Media’s Agenda
Rick’s background in media prompts Kevin to ask him why he thinks it is harder for the media to give more attention to positive news. Rick replies that while the media represents an important estate of society, the profession is narrow. Their goal is to tell a story, which requires certain dramatic features and elements such as a hero and a villain to keep viewers intrigued. The media only shows a glimpse of life, which is more often than not very emotive and spectacular because that interests viewers the most. This births a narrow, myopic view of the world.
Perspective
Rick shares his beliefs regarding the rights and freedoms of all people. As a pastor in the Christian faith, he views the world through a spiritual lens. All people are children of God, he says, and should be treated with equal love and respect regardless of their differences. He believes that God is speaking to His children through the chaos of current events, and is passing on an instruction of humility, repentance, and obedience.
Protests Then vs. Protests Now
Kevin asks Rick about the main differences between the protests of the 50’s and 60’s and the current protests. Peaceful protests did not mean the protesters were not angry, he says. Rick replies that the black church was largely responsible for shaping the moral compass of the civil rights movement, which shaped the narrative of the leadership. The protests of today lack direction, and while the energy and pragmatism are admirable, the absence of leadership provides no moral compass to point people towards, he claims. The blame for that partially falls on the baby boomer generation for not teaching their successors enough about their rights according to the Constitution and nonviolent, passive resistance.
People should fear saying nothing at all more than saying the wrong thing, Rick argues. People die for the right to speak out and do something, so those with that freedom should utilize it to its full power. America cannot afford for her citizens to be silent any longer. There is a common, misguided belief that argumentation and dissension are negative, but dissension advanced citizenry and democracy. “If you’re sitting on your butt, you can’t move forward,” Rick urges. In the end, we will not remember the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
Resources
Rick Rigsby on LinkedIn | Twitter | Facebook
Rick’s Podcast: How Ya Livin’?
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
Cracking the Leadership Code with Alain Hunkins
Alain Hunkins is the Managing Director of Hunkins Leadership Group and Leadership Development Consultant at AlainHunkins.com. He is also Senior Facilitator at Eagle’s Flight, futurethink, and The Energy Project, as well as Senior Consultant at JMReid Group. He chats with Kevin Monroe about his bestselling book, Cracking the Leadership Code: Three Secrets to Building Strong Leaders, and shares insights about becoming great stewards in the workplace in light of current events.
Leader of the Future
Many leaders see people as human resources instead of human beings. They are still stuck in the industrial age mindset, Alain says. The leader of the future must be able to embrace both masculine and feminine archetypal energies in order to effectively carry out their duties. Alain gives examples of good and bad leadership during the current global crisis. He and Kevin also comment on the civil unrest within America, talk about their privilege as white men, and call for systemic change in order to combat racial oppression.
Qualities that Leaders Need to Have
Kevin cites Alain’s book about the four important characteristics of good leaders according to a study involving 1700 CEOs from 64 countries and 18 industries. The four characteristics are: communicative; collaborative; flexible; and creative. These soft skills are essential for today’s leaders because the industrial-age, hierarchical, command, and control style of leadership doesn’t work anymore. Leaders should instead see themselves as facilitators of groups.
The Three Secrets
The three secrets to building strong leaders are connection, communication, and collaboration, in that order. Alain describes the model for these principles as concentric circles that include each one before it. Rather than a title or position, leadership is a relationship between one who chooses to lead and one who chooses to follow. The quality of that relationship is based on the quality of their connection, communication, and collaboration. In addition, the person who chooses to follow has the final say about the quality of the relationship, and only 23% of leaders understand this. Alain details each secret, how they intersect with one another, and how they apply currently.
The Three Trends
The three trends of the current working world are choice, transparency, and technology. These trends largely make up the key differences between the 21st and 20th centuries: past generations were not aware that they had a choice in following a leader, neither were they able to access the technologies that we have today. Subsequently, there was barely any demand for transparency.
Alain calls on leaders to become familiar with discomfort; if you’re always comfortable then you’re not growing.
Resources
Alain Hunkins on LinkedIn
Email: alain@alainhunkins.com
Cracking the Leadership Code: Three Secrets to Building Strong Leaders
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
A Quest to Higher Purpose -Part 2 with Shawn Askinosie
Shawn Askinosie is an author and the founder and CEO of Askinosie Chocolate. His book, Meaningful Work: A Quest to Do Great Business, Find Your Calling, and Feed Your Soul, takes readers on his journey to self-actualization and is a guide to how they can discover the secret to purposeful business. He joins Kevin Monroe for a follow-up episode to further explore concepts included in the book, as well as how they enabled him to help others.
How Much is “Enough”?
Kevin asks Shawn when he started thinking about the concept of “enough.” Shawn replies that as he embarked into a new career the idea of financial success and notoriety began to lose its luster. The paradoxical and mysterious connection between his joy and sorrow gave him clarity of purpose during those years of transition. “If you want to find yourself, lose yourself in service to others,” Shawn quotes.
Scale
Shawn claims that rapid growth is the temptation of our time, especially for entrepreneurs and people with ideas. In certain cases, scale is necessary and optimal, but you risk losing something when growth is valued above all else. He describes scaling as a dark temptation and warns that even when it’s for ostensibly good purposes, it may not actually be good. He describes an experience with a major retail company in which they give a fitting depiction of Askinosie Chocolate: they are about reverse scale.
Kinship
Kinship, Shawn says, is woven deep within the fabric of his company, is highly valued, and is another part of the human connection. He details how Askinosie Chocolate strives to engender kinship among their members, partners, and customers. Doing business with these values at the forefront is a much more rewarding pathway, he points out.
Relationships Affect Your Product
If you bake a loaf of bread with indifference, you bake a bitter bread that feeds but half man’s hunger, Kevin quotes. He asks Shawn to elaborate on the correlation between a good product and a human connection. Who we are and the product or service that we deliver are inseparable; we can’t peel them apart, Shawn replies. The value chain is enhanced through relationships. Shawn talks about the projects Askinosie Chocolate has undertaken, the impacts they have made in numerous communities internationally, and how the connections he has established with people have positively enhanced his life.
Fair and Direct Trade
Fair trade began with good intentions but has become so ubiquitous that it is now a victim of its own good marketing. Studies show that the premium added to the market price of products is not making its way to producers and is gradually lost along the complex supply chain. Shawn describes how Askinosie Chocolate has redefined fair trade into direct trade, including modified travel practices that ensure their producers get the profits they rightfully deserve.
Resources
Shawn Askinosie on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: hello@shawnaskinosie.com
Meaningful Work: A Quest to Do Great Business, Find Your Calling, and Feed Your Soul
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
A Quest to Higher Purpose with Shawn Askinosie
Shawn Askinosie is an author and the founder and CEO of Askinosie Chocolate. His book, Meaningful Work: A Quest to Do Great Business, Find Your Calling, and Feed Your Soul, takes readers on his journey to self-actualization and is a guide to how they can discover the secret to purposeful business. He joins Kevin Monroe to discuss his book and how its teachings apply to current events.
Threshold
Poet and philosopher John O’Donoghue would consider this current period a threshold, Shawn says. A threshold can be a dark place of panic, discomfort and depression, but also a place of teaching, awakening and connection with our higher selves, if we allow it. You have to understand your present position and acknowledge your fear, instead of waiting to reach the other side of the threshold. Kevin adds that he has realized that current events are the world’s “temporary new normal,” and we must learn to adjust to it rather than hold on to the normal of the past. We may all be in one of three places right now, according to Shawn: on a threshold; on the path to awakening, where you have a daily practice that keeps you grounded; or among the masters or teachers from whom we gain wisdom. The tools you can access on your path depend on where you are.
Success
Kevin quotes a line from Shawn’s book and asks him to elaborate. Shawn shares a story about a young girl’s positive experience with an employee of one of his stores, and says that even if his business fails, that moment of impact will be around forever. He considers that as part of his redefined meaning of success. “What people want to know is that they are joyfully alive,” he says.
The Journey
Shawn’s experience of losing the love and motivation he had for his career led him on a quest to discover a new passion. He shares some of the activities he participated in along his journey, a notable one being volunteer work in hospice care. Accepting his broken heart, caused by the death of his father, enabled him to connect with his true self. “Our greatest joy is sorrow unmasked,” Kevin quotes. This joy wants to explode out of our sorrow, and to access it we must be willing and open to find that pathway.
Floundering and Flourishing
The greatest freedom in humanity is the choice we make in response to the stimulus in our lives. Even in the midst of challenge and difficulty, we can decide whether to flounder or flourish. However, we must be able to surrender to the moment, and not just survive it. We do not have to wait until we cross the threshold to flourish, Shawn says.
Resources
Shawn Askinosie on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: hello@shawnaskinosie.com
(Blog) ShawnAskinosie.com
Meaningful Work: A Quest to Do Great Business, Find Your Calling, and Feed Your Soul
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
Follow It Forward
Kevin Monroe connects with listeners one-on-one in this week’s show. He discusses three activities leaders engage in and whether they are beneficial to their organizations.
Decade of Difference
Kevin’s previous expectation for the turn of the decade was for 2020 to open a decade of difference. He describes the current global pandemic as a “legacy shaping event,” one that will impact how people are regarded post-crisis based on how they responded and lived through it. Leading now is different, but many leaders are doing what they’ve always done in hope for a magically different result, Kevin says. The way of life and business pre-COVID-19 is no longer sustainable and so we must adapt.
Excuse-Making
The first activity is excuse-making. Kevin advises anyone who participates in making excuses to stop. When a leader makes excuses, they are not leading. When people engage in excuse-making, their focus is usually in the past. However, leadership involves accepting responsibility and being accountable for one’s decisions.
Sense-Making
Sense-making is the ability or attempt to make meaning in situations that are uncertain, complex or ambiguous so that you know what actions to take. The challenge the current crisis poses for sense-makers lies in the fluidity of events and how liable they are to rapid change. Sense-making is a leadership responsibility, highly valuable, and may enhance your legacy. However, it does not necessarily result in action, as there is often no end to the information that comes. There comes a time where you must make do with the information you have.
Way-Making
Similar to sense-making, way-making is defined as forging a solution despite difficulty, impossibility or uncertainty. The key differentiator between the two activities is that way-making is action-based and dependent on sense-making. It bridges the present to the future, invokes the pioneer spirit, and incorporates what you have learned in the sense-making process, Kevin adds. Way-makers begin their journey by assessing where they are now. They don’t need to have it all figured out; they just find the next step and follow it forward.
Resources
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
Searching for Hope with Dr. Rick Rigsby
Dr. Rick Rigsby is a former college professor, motivational speaker, minister, and President and CEO of Rick Rigsby Communications. He is also a USA Today, Amazon, and The Wall Street Journal best-selling author. He returns to the Higher Purpose Podcast to talk about hope: an invaluable asset to living a happy life.
The Benefits of Being Broken
Circumstances never leave you the same as you were before them. If a difficult season in your life breaks you, there's an unknown authenticity that can pour out of you as a result. Rick tells Kevin Monroe he feels at ease around broken people because they are authentic. He shares a definition of humility from his late friend: “Humility is the absolute God-given ability that eliminates the need to prove the worth of who you are and the rightness of what you do.” Broken people are humble, which is why Rick enjoys their company.
Losing Perspective
We are all leaders, Rick says. Leadership is influence; you are a leader if you are influencing anyone within your periphery. The first thing that's lost in a crisis is perspective, which it is incumbent upon a leader to lead with. Maintaining perspective is crucial to leadership during difficult times, as it can lead to hope for a better day. Feeling like you’ve lost hope is a result of losing perspective. As long as you are still breathing, you have hope.
Hope is...
Our casual use of the word hope has relegated it to the basement of human emotion and neutered its power. Rick defines hope as a quality contained within every human spirit that places a transformative demand upon the heart to believe for the absolute best outcome. Hope is more powerful than a strategy: a strategy is a plan, whereas hope is a belief; strategy is external, whereas hope is an internal virtue that can improve your quality of life.
Hope energizes, it’s active, alive, passionate, and transformative. It requires courage. Fear is a reaction; courage is a choice. One must choose to be brave even through fear. Hope requires faith. Lastly, the characteristic that moves hope out of the realm of strategy is the requirement of an immediate decisive response.
Renewing Your Mind
The thoughts we cultivate have a butterfly effect on other aspects of our lives, so we should pay careful attention to them. You have to renew your mind in order to not be negatively affected by external factors. Every day a choice must be made to replace thoughts of negativity with positive thoughts and affirmations, especially during the current crisis.
Unfounded Hope
Kevin shares a saying his friend told him; misplaced hope is more dangerous than not having hope at all. Rick says that rather than misplaced, the more applicable description would be unfounded hope, which he defines as hope based on a set arbitrary condition. While it is critical to have hope, one must remain realistic with one’s expectations, else they will be reducing hope to wish fulfillment. However, not having any hope at all, Rick believes, is death to the soul. Hope is idiosyncratic, so even if your hope may seem unfounded to others, if it is what keeps you moving forward, there is no room for judgment.
Resources
Rick Rigsby on LinkedIn | Twitter | Facebook
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
The Healing Organization with Raj Sisodia
Rajendra Sisodia is an author and the co-founder and co-Chairman of Conscious Capitalism Inc. He is also the FW Olin Distinguished Professor of Global Business and Whole Foods Market Research Scholar in Conscious Capitalism at Babson College. His latest book, The Healing Organization: Awakening the Conscience of Business to Help Save the World, explores the idea of business as healing. He joins Kevin Monroe to discuss his book, and how its principles apply to organizations around the world.
Epidemic of Silent Suffering
Raj claims that the current crisis has only exacerbated underlying problems within the workplace and society: it has “made explicit what was already quite implicit and under the surface.” The faults in our systems have always been the unseen part of the iceberg. He shares statistics concerning stress-related deaths, overworking and disengagement, stating that it is evidence of an epidemic of silent suffering. Vulnerability has always defined us as human beings, he comments, but now it unites us. He and Kevin discuss their personal response to the current crisis. Raj says that he has been thinking about how he can serve.
The Healing Organization
A healing organization recognizes the role of business in the world. Raj believes human beings are put here to take care of each other. If you start a business, you could touch the lives of potentially thousands of people. Businesses which have the mindset of serving others and meeting their real needs are places of healing for those who work there. Employees leave work at the end of the day feeling better off than when they came in. They can also be a source of healing for customers and communities, as they provide goods and services that make a positive difference in their lives, rather than simply feeding their desires and addictions. Capitalism, Raj says, is the way in which we can cooperate with each other to achieve things we cannot do by ourselves, and come together with a shared purpose and shared values.
Healing Leaders
Unexpressed human caring is the most abundant underutilized resource in the world. Human beings have a need and desire to care: it brings fulfilment to our lives. If we can connect silent suffering and unexpressed human caring, we would have the opportunity for healing to take place, for both the receiver of care and the caregiver. Leaders must model the vulnerability and the willingness to express their needs. Kevin asks what differentiates regular leaders from leaders of healing organizations. Raj replies that leaders of healing organizations have a more expanded view of leadership; they recognize that leadership is the stewardship of the lives entrusted to them, and that the way they lead impacts the way people live. Leaders, however, cannot be healing leaders if they haven’t yet healed themselves. Kevin inquires whether every business can become a healing organization. Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future, Raj quotes.
The Right Thing to Do
Organizations shouldn’t decide to do the right thing purely because it may be good for business. Leaders must believe that taking care of people is the right thing to do in order to do it for the right reasons. The notion that the wellbeing of people is only an instrument that contributes to profits has to change. The business of business is people. True business creates value.
Resources
Raj Sisodia on LinkedIn | Twitter
The Healing Organization: Awakening the Conscience of Business to Help Save the World
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
Resilience During Challenging Times with Tim Arnold
Tim Arnold is the author of The Power of Healthy Tension: Overcome Chronic Issues and Conflicting Values. He is a speaker and facilitator at StoryBrand, and the President of Leaders for Leaders. He joins Kevin Monroe to share the secrets to resilience and results during challenging times.
Tensions
Everyone deals with tension in their everyday lives, and tension is generally considered to be a bad thing. However, Tim says, not all tension is inherently bad. Ignoring or avoiding tensions may only cause them to escalate; if we choose to embrace them, it can lead to a level of effectiveness, and more impactful relationships with others. During challenging times, there are a few tensions that matter and need to be managed in healthy ways. When you’re dealing with tension you need to see both sides of the struggle. We may want to pick one side more strongly when we’re under pressure, but Tim warns that it is the worst time to choose one side and neglect the other.
Resilience
Tim defines resilience as the ability to keep going when your circumstances are against you. It is something you assess over time. Three tensions that are critical to obtain and maintain resilience are: optimism and realism, embracing change while staying rooted in stability, and caring for others while not neglecting to care for yourself. He explains each tension and what they entail.
Optimism and Realism
There is something in our psyche that loves binary options, Tim says. Though the tension is between picking a side, in order to be resilient you must be fully immersed in both ends of the spectrum of both optimism and realism. Kevin likens it to an infinity loop rather than a pure continuum. One must retain hope for a better future while remaining aware of and acknowledging the bitter facts of reality, Tim paraphrases. He shares three steps to managing tensions: accept the tension; assess the tension; and leverage the tension.
Change and Stability
Change brings with it new circumstances, which may cause you to neglect your core values and let go of what really matters. When difficult times pass, ensure that you are still the same regarding who you serve, the values you are committed to, and the level of quality you are known for. However, you must be open to change and the experience and perspective it gives.
Caring for Others and Oneself
Tim and Kevin discuss how you can reach out to others during the pandemic, and what you can do to help them. Kevin recounts a lesson from a previous episode: people think that they need to do grand gestures in order to assist anyone. Rather than thinking of all the things you wish you could be doing, think about one small thing that you’re going to start doing, Tim says. He comments on the misconception of self-care perpetuated by mass media, stating that simplistic rituals such as sitting down to enjoy a cup of coffee are just as effective.
Resources
Tim Arnold on LinkedIn | Twitter
Join Kevin and Tim for their first series of WayMaking Sessions -- helping you navigate your way forward: ZoomMeIn.com
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade
Bringing Gratitude with Karl Staib
Karl Staib is the founder and President of Domino Connection, an author, and owner of Bring Gratitude LLC. His most recent book, Bring Gratitude: Feel Joyful Again with Bite-Sized Mindset Practices, talks about bringing gratitude to each and every situation in your life, whether good or bad. He joins Kevin Monroe to discuss the contents of his book and how its principles apply to the current pandemic.
Gratitude is the Foundation
More emphasis needs to be placed on gratitude in our daily lives because gratitude is the foundation of where we can start to make changes, Karl says. The more we put our focus on the things we are grateful for, the more those things will come to light and add abundance to our experiences. Gratitude is a key component in living a more joyful life. According to Karl, gratitude is the best way to release endorphins in your brain. These ‘feel-good’ chemicals make us less stressed and help calm us. When we are calm, we make better choices, which enables us to do things that truly matter to us.
An Opportunity
The current global pandemic gives us the opportunity for us to understand and have more compassion for those around us. We can use this time of social distancing to make shifts in our mindsets and habits. Although it is scary and we must remain cautious and vigilant, we should not let this opportunity go to waste.
Finding Gratitude in the Challenge
“If I can turn any situation into a growth experience, I can appreciate any moment now,” Kevin quotes from Karl’s book. He asks Karl how it may apply to our current situation. Karl replies that everyone struggles on a daily basis, and if we practice compassion, it opens up our hearts and makes it easier to feel gratitude even during the struggle. He describes a challenge he faced during the pandemic, and how he was able to subvert it by his regular practices of gratitude.
The Strength of Gratitude
In addition to sending out endorphins, gratitude shifts our mindsets. It has a direct effect on what we choose to think about, which dictates who we are and how we behave. It is a powerful tool that helps moderate our reactions to negative experiences. Karl says that bringing gratitude to negative interactions with people allows you to be thoughtful of your next steps. Meditation is a huge part of gratitude, he adds, because it enables you to pause and appreciate the whole moment. This ensures that you do not get swept away by your thoughts and succumb to your ‘inner bully.’ It teaches you your triggers, and once you are aware of them, then you can use gratitude and compassion to make sure you stay level-headed.
Positive Rumination
The things you think about at the end of the day will go into your long term memory. Additionally, what you put into your head at night solidifies as thoughts and feelings the next day. If you focus on negative things like dwelling on your mistakes, you gain nothing but negativity. However, if you acknowledge your mistakes and approach them with the intention of learning from them, you gain knowledge and perspective. You must take the negative moments and flip them into positive ones in order to live a joyful life. The people that grow and achieve success are the ones who learn from their mistakes.
Resources
Karl Staib on LinkedIn | Twitter
Bring Gratitude on Facebook
Bring Gratitude: Feel Joyful Again with Bite-Sized Mindset Practices
Kevin Monroe on LinkedIn | Twitter
Email: kevin@higherpurposepodcast.com
Call or text Kevin: 678-744-5111Join the community: KevinDMonroe.com/decade